


Spiraling Touched Calamity

by starlightoffandoms (destinyofdreams)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Adoption, Alternate Universe - Human, Bigotry & Prejudice, Dean Has Self-Worth Issues, Fake/Pretend Relationship, First Kiss, Friends to Lovers, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, M/M, Mild Language, Multi, Past Child Abuse, Past self harm mentioned, Recreational Drug Use, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Sharing a Bed, Some domestic destiel fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-08
Updated: 2015-01-11
Packaged: 2018-02-23 14:00:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 40,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2550137
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destinyofdreams/pseuds/starlightoffandoms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean had been trying continuously to get approved to adopt a child.  He had been turned down over and over again. Castiel wanted to offer to pretend to be Dean’s spouse in order to get him the child that he wanted and needed so desperately.  He was scared that Dean would laugh at him so he never offered.  Castiel did make Dean change his application to include the option to foster.  It got him moved up the list and a home inspection.  Dean turned the tables when the woman from the agency showed up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Dean slammed the door of the impala and rushed to his house.  He pulled the gate to the mail box open and shuffled nervously through the mail.  His eyes lit up as he saw the letter from _Angelic Pairings_. He almost dropped the keys as he fumbled to get the door unlocked.  Dean sat his keys and the other mail on the table by the door.  He took a deep breath and closed his eyes.  He kissed the envelope and tried to steady his hands.  The envelope wasn’t thick or thin, it was in the middle.  Dean opened it carefully and pulled the pages out.  He unfolded it and read it excitedly.  He groaned and his shoulders slumped.  Dean didn’t bother to read the rest of the letter after the declaration of his denial again.  He crumpled the letter up and tossed it.

Dean bit his jaw and swallowed hard as he trudged to the kitchen.  He opened the fridge and grabbed a beer.  He plopped down in a chair at the dining room table.  Dean took a long gulp and tried to push the rush of tears away.  He closed his eyes and let the tears silently roll down his face.  He finished his beer and grabbed another as he heard the front door open.

“Dean?” the warm gruff voice called from the foyer.

“Kitchen,” Dean called out as he wiped his face.

“Hey.  Ready for some poker?  Sam says he’s going to be a little late,” Castiel turned the corner in the kitchen.

“Yeah okay,” Dean muttered.

“Dean,” Castiel frowned and went to his friend, “what’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Dean sipped his beer.

“You sure?” Castiel touched his shoulder gently as he watched his friend with a creased brow.

“I,” Dean choked, “check the hall there’s a crumpled ball of paper.”

“Alright,” Castiel gave his shoulder a squeeze and left his side.

Castiel returned with the letter and smoothed it out as best as he could.  Castiel sighed and placed the letter on the table after he read it over.  He went to Dean and wrapped his arms around him.  He said nothing as he comforted his friend.  Castiel remained quiet as he felt the warm tears on his neck when Dean turned into the hug.  They stayed that way for several minutes until Dean ceased his sobs.  Castiel went to the downstairs bathroom and got a cool cloth and wiped Dean’s face.

“Thanks man,” Dean cleared his throat and smiled weakly up at Castiel.

“What are friends for?” Castiel returned the smile.

“I just don’t understand,” Dean sighed as they moved to the living room.

“Neither do I,” Castiel sat down across from Dean.

“I have a full time job, the house is mine and I have a huge heart with so much love to give.  Why won’t they let me have a child?” Dean bit his lip and focused on the beer in his hand.

“I don’t know.  You meet all the qualifications that I saw listed and more.  You have a stable environment, a great support network and plenty of space.   You passed the psychological profiling.  Which was a surprise to us all,” Castiel teased, “maybe you should try a different agency.”

“This is the fifth agency.  They are the ones that have placed children in single parent homes.  It was my best shot.  Now I have been turned down.  I have to get married.  It’s that simple,” Dean chugged the rest of his beer, “they aren’t going to let me have a child unless I’m married.  I need a husband or wife.”

“I wouldn’t rush into that,” Castiel cleared his throat and tried not to make eye contact, “there has to be another way.”

“Well I don’t know any other way.  I have everything else just like you said.  Maybe Jo will marry me.  That way I don’t have to worry about love.   She and I can pretend to be married and we can get a kid.  She wants kids.  It would be perfect.”

“Except you would have to live with Jo again.  Remember when you did that while you were in college?  It was not fun and you don’t have enough room for her gun _and_ knife collection.”

“What about Benny?  You think . . . no never mind that is a horrible idea,” Dean shook his head.

“Why don’t you forget about it for now and then we’ll come back to it?  The guys will be here in a little bit.  I’ll order the food and you can pull out the cards and chips,” Castiel stood and went to the den where the computer was set up.

Gabriel and Sam showed as the food arrived.  They gathered around the table and Dean dealt out cards.  Castiel watched him but said nothing.  Dean had hidden the letter before the others had shown up and had no intention of letting them know.

“Deano my man,” Gabriel placed his cards on the table, “looks like you’re just not having a great night tonight,” he grabbed his winnings and stacked them with the rest of his chips.

“I guess I’m just unlucky tonight,” Dean gave a half hearted smiled and sipped the water Castiel had placed in front of him.

“Everything okay Dean?” Sam eyed him.

“Yeah.  Was just a long day at work.”

“I think we should call it a night,” Castiel stumbled as he made his way back with a handful of pretzels and dropped down in his chair.

“Maybe you should call it a night,” Gabriel chuckled, “how much did you drink?”

“A little bit,” Castiel slowly closed just one eye then giggled as he ate the pretzels, “I’m fine.”

“You want us to drive you home?” Sam asked as he started to clean up.

“Neh.  I’ll be okay,” Castiel tossed a pretzel in the air and tried to catch it in his mouth but it hit him in the face.

“Don’t worry about it,” Dean shook his head laughing, “he can stay here.  There’s no need for you guys to go out of your way.  He’ll sleep it off in the guest room and hate himself in the morning.”

“Guest room,” Gabriel winked, “right.”

“Let’s finish up and get home.  Jess will kill us if we come in too late.”

“This polyamorous stuff was a lot more attractive on TV,” Gabriel picked up the empty bottles and placed them in the recycling.

“I’ll let you have the outside tonight,” Sam replied as he slipped on his shoes.

“Gotta go fellas.  Don’t let my baby bro have any more to drink.”

Dean saw them out and locked up behind them.  He returned to the dining room and Castiel finished the clean up.

“They’re gone?” Castiel whispered as he looked up from the dishwasher.

“You little fake,” Dean chuckled.

“I didn’t want them to get into your business since you have not told them yet,” Castiel shrugged as he dried his hands.

“Thank you.  I think _I_ might be a little drunk though.”

“Just a smidgen.  I’ll give them a head start then be on my way.”

“Stay.  Let’s watch a movie.”

“Okay.”

 

Dean slumped onto Castiel’s shoulder thirty minutes into the movie.  Castiel did nothing for awhile.  He closed his eyes and nuzzled Dean’s hair.  He exhaled slowly and took a deep inhale.  A soft moan escaped him as he pulled Dean close.  Dean gave a contented sigh and snuggled into him.  Castiel smiled and let sleep take him.

Castiel woke a couple of hours later with a sore neck and too warm.  His eyes fluttered open.  He was still on the couch with Dean in his lap.  Castiel glanced at the DVD screen saver as it bounced on the TV.  He reached for the remote and turned both off.  He gently shook Dean.

“Marry me Cas,” Dean mumbled and pulled him closer.

Castiel’s breath caught.  His eyes went wide and he froze.

“Then we adopt.”

Castiel rolled his eyes and shook Dean again.  It took a few minutes but Dean slowly regained consciousness.

“You didn’t make it through the movie.”

“I see,” Dean yawned and sat up, “how will I ever live without knowing about Milo and Otis’ adventure?”

“Let’s get you to bed,” Castiel chuckled.

Castiel stood and pulled Dean to his feet.  Castiel guided him slowly up the stairs and to his room.  Dean began to take off his clothes as he shuffled to the bed.  Castiel stood for a moment then turned and left.  He went down the hall to the guest room and stripped down and got in bed.

<<<<>>>> 

Castiel watched as Dean finished the new paperwork.  Castiel smiled.  It had taken him weeks to convince Dean to resubmit the paperwork with new information and an open mind.

“Are you sure Cas?  I mean, when I fostered for the puppies I got so attached and people came and took them away.  This is a child.  How will I let another person come in here and take a human being that I have loved and cared for?” Dean looked down at the papers.

“I think that it is the only thing that could have held you back.  If you give them an opportunity to place a child in your care even if only temporarily it will give them reason to trust you.”

“Alright,” Dean signed the last page and shuffled the papers together.

“Plus we’ve set up a room with neutral colours and toys just in case.  I think that you have a great chance at getting a child now.”

“I hope so,” Dean stuffed the papers in the prepaid envelope and sealed it, “this is something that I want more than anything.  I have everything else that I need.  I just want a child to love and raise.  How can I not get one when I so much love to give?”

“I think you’re prepared this time better than any of the others,” Castiel smiled warmly at Dean.

“You’re the best friend anyone could ask for,” Dean gave Castiel’s hand a squeeze.

“I am always here for you Dean.”

“Thanks for that,” Dean gave his hand another squeeze before he got up, “I have to get down to the studio.  There are some guitar tracks that I need to lay down for a new singer.”

“I should get down to the offices.  I think they may have another project started that they may need help with.”

“We still on for dinner tomorrow?” Dean grabbed his wallet and keys.

“Yup.”

Castiel headed out ahead of Dean and got into his truck.  He headed home instead of his office.  He was barely through the door before his brother entered.

“Hey bro,” Gabriel greeted.

“What are you doing on this side of town?” Castiel slipped his shoes off and padded into the kitchen.

“I actually saw you at the light and followed you home.  I just left the restaurant.”

“Oh,” Castiel grabbed a wine cooler for himself and a beer for Gabriel.

“So how is Dean doing?” Gabriel took the beer that Castiel handed him.

“He finally told you guys?”

“He told Sam.”

“Well,” Castiel took a sip, “he is going to try and do fostering instead.  I think he has a better chance at getting a child placed with him if he has experience with one living with him.”

“You do realize that fostering a child is not guaranteed adoption right?  If someone else comes a long they could take little Johnny away.  Dean would be devastated,” Gabriel watched Castiel closely.

“We discussed this already.  I told him that we will go through counseling if needed to help prepare if it does come down to the child being taken away.  I think that we have a great chance since he is looking for an older child.  He isn’t looking to take in an infant or toddler.”

“Good.  It’s always good to have merchandise ready to use,” Gabriel smiled at the ‘we’ but said nothing of it.

“Your humor has always been off colour so I am not surprised by that comment,” Castiel smirked, “most people are looking to raise a child from the beginning.  Dean wants to give an older child a chance to have something more.”

“This has nothing to do with his dislike for the way his father raised him right?  He isn’t trying to be the father he never had is he?” Gabriel narrowed his eyes.

“I think the way John raised Dean does impact his decision here.  While Mary was unable to care for them and before she married Mark, John was the head of the household and his parenting skills were not the best.”

“Think about that there.  The courts gave custody to John until Mary actually got married.  A man who spent every six months moving while he was enlisted.”

“It was because of Mary’s hours.  She was always on call until she opened her own practice.  They could not place such young children with someone that was never home.  Once she married and her hours were reasonable she fought and won the custody battle.  Dean is who he is because of the later years not the early years,” Castiel clenched his jaw at the thoughts of Dean’s childhood.

“Sam called him dad.”

“Look let’s talk about something else.  You are getting under my skin,” Castiel drained the rest of the bottle.

“Yes.  What’s your next project?”

“I do not know yet.  They have not assigned me anything since I have finished the Anderson project.  I think they are planning to send me on loan to the Smithsonian for a long term project.”

“That’s one hell of a drive.”

“Well depending on the term I may move out there.  That’s why I have not purchased a home out here.  I have no idea where I will be with each assignment.  The Anderson project was two years,” Castiel went to the fridge and rummaged around for a snack.

“You could always accept the contract at the university.  They offered to give you tenure straight off the bat because of how often you help them.  Then you could stay here in the city,” Gabriel took a long swig from his beer.

“I love Sam but I am not someone that can work hand in hand with my soon to be brother-in-law.  If we got in a spat at work it would change our personal relationship,” Castiel replied as he began to cook.

“You have worked with him before.”

“Yes as a partner.  They are offering me the head of his department.  It would be different.”

“Would it make you feel better if I told you he was going to a different department?”

“He is?” Castiel looked up from the stove.

“Yes.  He was a double major.  Anthropology and criminal justice.  They want him in the legal department now.  So if you took the lead of the Anthro department you would not have anything to do with him,” Gabriel smiled.

“Hm.  I will consider it then.  I will wait to see what I get from the firm.  If it is not as lucrative as I expect then I may take the university up on it.  Enough of my life.  How is it going with the search for another location for the new restaurant?”

“I have a few locations that I like but I have to check out the visibility and foot traffic for a few more weeks on the ones I really like.  I don’t want to open another restaurant and no one be there,” Gabriel leaned against the counter, “financially I don’t want to take the risk.”

“I saw a sign for sale on the old Liberty Lodge and Resort.  I was by there a few weeks ago,” Castiel offered as he finished cooking.

“What?” Gabriel’s eyes lit up.

“Yes,” Castiel smiled as his brother’s excitement.

“That would be perfect,” Gabriel got a faraway look in his eyes as Castiel sat a plate in front of him.

“I figured you would like to know.  You had been eyeing it for years.”

“I’ve got a few calls to make.  After I eat,” Gabriel nodded as his mind flowed to planning his attack to get the ideal location.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey there cuties! Thanks so much for reading and giving me some of your time!
> 
> I do not know anything about modern adoption. I am not an expert. Things that are covered in this story will be from personal experience back in the 90's and what I see on television.
> 
> As always I do not own the copyrighted characters.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The home inspection and Gabriel gets good news.

Castiel and Dean walked every inch of Dean’s house to make sure everything was in place.  While Dean double checked the half bath downstairs Castiel slipped an anti-anxiety pill into Dean’s juice.  When he returned Dean finished his drink and placed the cup in the dishwasher.  Castiel rubbed his shoulders as Dean sat and tapped his foot.

“Take a few deep breaths,” Castiel murmured.

“Yes.  I can’t believe I am getting a home inspection,” Dean giggled, “I was turned down without a question or real answer before and now I have an inspection.  Cas I wouldn’t be here without you,” he touched his hand.

“Hey you deserve this,” Castiel tried to quiet his heart as he gave Dean one final squeeze.

The doorbell rang and they both jumped.  The buzzer on the oven went off and they jumped again.

“You get the door and I’ll get the brownies,” Castiel told Dean as he went around the counter and grabbed an oven mitt.

Dean nodded and went to the door.  He took one last deep breath and opened the door.

“Hello Dean,” Missouri smiled as she slung her bag over her shoulder.

“Mrs. Moseley.  So glad you could make it.  I hope the drive wasn’t too bad,” Dean shook her hand then stepped aside.

“It was pleasant and very beautiful,” Missouri walked pass him and her eyes immediately began to roam over the foyer.

“Good very good,” Dean tucked his hands in his pockets.

“Would you prefer I took off my shoes?” Missouri glanced at the shoe bench in the hall.

“Only if it would make you more comfortable.”

“Thank you.  You’re my fifth house today and these heels are killing me dear,” Missouri slipped out of her shoes and gave a sigh, “what smells so wonderful?”

“Oh.  I was cooking desserts for our family dinner tonight.  I was trying to get it out of the way before you got here but I started later than expected,” Dean told the little white lie as he led her to the kitchen.

“Oh hi,” Castiel popped up from the secondary oven and put the second pan of brownies on the cooling mats, “sorry I was supposed to be gone,” he smiled and took off the oven mitts.

“Hello there,” Missouri’s smile grew, “I didn’t realize you had a partner.  It wasn’t in the paperwork,” she sat down her bag and opened it.

“Oh,” Castiel’s eyes went wide, “I think you misunderstand,” he chuckled, “I’m not his partner.  I’m his--”

“Fiancé.  Castiel is my fiancé,” Dean moved to Castiel’s side, “I must have forgotten to include that in my excitement to reapply.”

“Oh,” Missouri pulled out her ledger and began to write on it, “yes that is very good.”

“It is?” Castiel felt his face warm as Dean put an arm around him.

“Yes.  It is always easier to place when there is a spouse even if it isn’t finalized yet,” Missouri chuckled, “this is very good.  I am glad that your file came across my desk.  I looked over your previous applications and I am not sure why you were not higher on our list.  This will move you up even quicker.”

“Excellent,” Dean smiled as he pulled Castiel closer.

“So what do you do Castiel?”

“I am a research assistant at the Garrison Firm,” Castiel took a step from Dean to let himself breathe.

“Ooh wonderful,” Missouri continued to write, “and how long have you and Dean been together?”

“I’ve known him since high school,” Castiel started slowly as he stiffly leaned back into Dean’s embrace.

“Then we went through college as roommates.  Somehow it just clicked a few years ago and we ended up here,” Dean kissed Castiel’s cheek.

Castiel felt his face warm.

“Aw he doesn’t like public displays of affection.  That is adorable,” Missouri chuckled as she jotted down more notes, “do you currently live together?”

“No,” Castiel cleared his throat, “when I got the contract with the Garrison Firm they supplied my living arrangements and Dean and I had not gotten serious yet.  I live across town.  We have been discussing living arrangements.  I have not gotten my next assignment yet so things are in the air.  I may be placed at the Smithsonian and have to make the commute a few times a week.  If I get placed out of the city then I will be moving in,” he turned out of Dean’s grip and picked up the spatula to get the brownies onto a dish.

“The Smithsonian?” Missouri nodded with a pleased smile.

“Yes.  I have also been made an offer at the university, Parlor Rosemont, as head of their anthropology department.  I have a great choice to make in the next month,” Castiel advised.

“Very good.  You and Dean have discussed the option of fostering a child and adoption?”

“Oh yes.  In depth,” Castiel turned and gave her an honest smile, “I made him update the application.  I figured with fostering it would open up our options.  When he first began to apply we were just friends with benefits.  Now that it has evolved into something more I wanted to be in the process a little deeper.  It will be changing both of our lives.”

“Yes,” Missouri turned to Dean, “why don’t we start that tour?”

“Yes ma’am.”

Castiel watched them leave the room and waited for them to be out of sight before he slumped against the counter.  He closed his eyes and took a ragged breath in as he ran a hand through his hair.  He grumbled a moment then turned back to the brownies.  It had been his idea to use the old real estate trick of baked goods to give that home feeling.  Dean had chosen brownies instead of cookies because he had heard of Missouri’s weakness for the dessert.  He had called Mary and she had given her recipe.  Castiel left the lid off each container to make sure they cooled the rest of the way.

 

“And this is the room that we have set up,” Dean pushed the door open to the child’s room.

“I like this a lot,” Missouri nodded as she walked into the room with the ledger clutched to her chest to hide what she had written.

“We decided on neutral colours and the furniture to be set for an older child.  We do have a crib in the attic if we are placed with a baby instead.”

“I saw the preference for a child between eight and fifteen.  I actually loved that.  It is so hard to place the older ones ya know?  I think this is acceptable,” Missouri turned so Dean could not look over her shoulder as she jotted down her notes, “I have a question and I need you to be honest with me,” she looked up and eyed Dean suspiciously.

“Yes ma’am,” Dean swallowed hard and shoved his hands into his pockets.

“Did you not mention Castiel because you were afraid that we wouldn’t place a child in a home with homosexual couple?” Missouri watched him closely.

“I,” Dean looked to the floor and closed his eyes for a moment and sighed, “yes.  Eh, I wasn’t sure how Angelic Pairings would respond.  I assume you’re religion based from the name and I know how some people can be.”

“Oh Dean,” Missouri walked to him and wrapped her arms around him.

Missouri hugged Dean for a long moment then let him go.  She smiled softly at him and walked from the room.  Dean’s jaw dropped and his eye flicked back and forth unfocused for a moment before he followed behind Missouri.

“And I am guessing this is your room?” Missouri pushed open the door to the spring coloured room with its soft greens, yellows and blues.

“Yes.  It’s the master suite.”

“I am jealous,” she walked in and nodded her approval, “two walk in closets.  I would give a lot for a bedroom like this.  Ooh,” she entered the en suite, “a separate tub with jets and a shower with double shower heads.  This is my dream.”

“Yeah,” Dean chuckled, “the massage settings are amazing.  I remodeled when I bought the place.  I wanted my own little getaway right here.  The closets were actually Cas’ idea before we even got together.  There was a small room that had been used as a nursery and we tore the walls out and created this suite.  He thought I would need the space once I settled down.  I am a little selfish when it comes to space and he thought I would be happier if there were his and hers everything.”

“And who knew it would be his and his,” Missouri chuckled and winked as she admired the marble counter tops.

“Yeah.  Would you like to see the back yard?  I have set up a little bit of a play area.”

“Sure.  Then I would love to see your entertainment area.  I noticed there weren’t any televisions in the bedrooms.”

“Oh,” Dean gave a nervous smile, “see growing up was different for me.  I would hide in my bedroom with my television and I would not be part of everything.  I missed out on a lot.  I decided if we wanted to watch television, play games or whatever we’d do it as a family.  So I set the family room up for us,” he explained as he headed back down the stairs.

“I like that,” Missouri made a note as she followed Dean down the hall to the right of the stairs.

“I added doors to give it kind of a theater effect,” Dean grinned and pushed opened the curtained doors.

“Yes this is very lovely,” Missouri took in the room.

It was simple layout that Dean had taken with in order to get the desired effect.  The simple wooden entertainment center housed the midsized television, gaming consoles and DVD player.  It was furnished with overstuffed furniture and giant pillows.  The heavy drapes were closed and the room lay in shadow until Dean flicked the light switch. 

“How do you feel about a 51 year old child?” Missouri teased as she eyed the collection of games and movies on the side of the entertainment center.

Dean chuckled as he watched her review the titles.

“Alright.  Let’s see this backyard that you are proud of.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Dean turned off the lights and shut the doors behind them.  They crossed back through the living room to the patio doors. Castiel moved from the dining room to cut them off.

“I have to head out.  I am already a few minutes late to meet your brother for help with his next lecture,” Castiel walked up to Dean held his gaze.

“Oh yeah.  I forgot you were meeting Sam.  I am so sorry dear,” Dean pulled him for a quick kiss on the cheek, “let him know that we’re bringing dessert so he doesn’t have to make Jess bake again.”

“Will do,” Castiel felt the warm blush spread as Dean ran a hand down the side of his face as if he did it every day.

“See ya later sweetheart,” Dean gave him one last kiss then Castiel headed out, “where were we?”

“You two are adorable.”

“Sorry about that,” Dean ducked his head.

“Don’t worry about it.”

Dean cleared his throat and slid the patio door open.

 

Castiel made it around the block before he had to pull over to keep himself from hyperventilating.  Dean had kissed him and was affectionate with him and it threw him off.  He pressed his forehead against the steering wheel and continued to breathe deeply.  When his phone rang it startled him and he hit his Bluetooth button on the dash.

“Hello Gabriel.”

“I GOT IT!”

“What?”

“I got the Liberty Lodge and Resort property!”

“That is great Gabriel,” Castiel smiled and sat back, “did you have to pay over market like you thought?”

“Nope.  The other person that wanted it backed out so not only did I get it under market but they threw in closing cost.  They needed to get rid of it as quickly as possible.  Apparently it’s been vacant and the family took it over last year.  They’d been losing money on it.  I am on way to sign the final papers now!”

“We need to celebrate.  This is amazing.  You got your place and Dean has his home inspection today.  It is cause for a real celebration tonight,” Castiel put the truck in gear and pulled back onto the road.

“Come by the restaurant tonight.  I have to call Sam and Jess and let them know.”

“You called me first?” Castiel smile grew even wider.

“If it wasn’t for you I would not have known about it so I felt you should be the first to know,” Gabriel sounded bashful.

“Go tell your loved ones.  We’ll be there at seven.”

“Alright.  See ya.”

The call clicked off and the music turned back on.  Castiel was half way home when another call rang through.

“Hello Dean.”

“I am so sorry.”

“Dean,” Castiel sighed.

“I know.  I know.  I _know_.  I am so fucking sorry.  I saw the opportunity and I jumped at it,” Dean let the shame leak into his voice.

“It was just something we had not prepared for.  I was taken by surprise,” Castiel closed his eyes as he pulled up at the stoplight.

“Please don’t hate me.”

“I could never hate you Dean.”

“Oh,” the smile was present in his voice even if it was small.

“I was tempted to suggest it before but I figured I did not want to get myself in that situation.  Dean this is an extremely big lie.  This is not something that we are telling our parents to get out of chores.  This may not be a government run facility but we could still get into a lot of trouble,” Castiel voiced his concern and hoped the excitement was not audible.

“I understand.  You know, you could just marry me.  Then it wouldn’t be a lie.”

Castiel chuckled, “very funny Dean.”

“Yeah funny,” Dean laughed nervously.

“Dean?” Castiel glanced down at his phone in the cradle as if he could see Dean.

“So, what are you doing right now?”

“Heading home.”

“I’ll meet you there.  We have a lot to talk about.”

“No.  I, uh, have some work to do.  Gabriel got his location so we’re meeting at the restaurant tonight at seven.  We can talk after that.”

“Cas?” Dean sighed, “okay.  I’ll see you tonight.”

The call clicked to an end.  Castiel shook his head as he pulled into his driveway.

“What has my life become?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys! I wasn't sure how this would be taken as a story, so thanks so much! I love sharing my time with you. Thanks so much for the kudos, comments and just taking the time to read. I love you guys!


	3. Chapter 3

“Thanks so much for coming guys,” Gabriel hugged Castiel as they stood in the parking lot.

“You have a lot of work ahead of you.  Let me know if you need anything at all,” Castiel smiled down at his brother.

“I will probably need your eye for colour and floor layouts.  There is so much to be thought out and changed.”

“I’ll help where I can.  Though I feel some way about being the gay man chosen to help with colour schemes,” Castiel teased.

“Well out of all of us you’re the only one that’s strictly dickly,” Gabriel winked.

“I’m going to let that slide,” Castiel shook his head.

“Deano,” Gabriel threw his arms around him, “I am so happy for you.  You’ll have a little munchkin in no time.”

“Thanks man,” Dean let the hug linger longer than he would normally, “I still have friends in the construction biz to get you a decent deal on renovations for your property.  Just let me know when you want to talk.  I know it’s still a few weeks out.”

“Thanks.”

“We’ll see you guys at the house Saturday right?” Sam asked as he headed to his car.

“Yup.  Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“You just want to use the new barbeque pit,” Jess laughed.

“Possibly,” Dean chuckled.

“See ya then.”

Dean headed out and followed Castiel back to his house since it was closer to the restaurant.  Dean took a deep breath as he stepped out of the impala and fell in step behind Castiel.

“Coffee?” Castiel offered as he hung his keys and kicked off his shoes.

“Yeah.”

“I have some pie as well,” Castiel smiled as he put the k-cup in the machine.

“Great.”

“So,” Castiel cut Dean a large slice of pie, “how did the rest of the inspection go?”

“It went pretty good.  She loved the swing set that you put up.  Most of the things that she loved were your ideas.  It was easier than I thought to pass as a couple.  You are my best friend and you’ve helped put the house together.”

“Right.  I suspect once I was gone there were more questions about me,” Castiel sat the plate in front of Dean and watched him.

“Yes.  You will have to also take the psych evaluation.  She would like to do an interview with you privately as well.  Missouri is on our side.  She was shocked that the other case workers didn’t try harder for me.  I like her a lot,” Dean picked up his fork.

“She seems like a great woman.  Did you make sure she took some brownies with her?”

“Yes.  She was very pleased.  That was such a great idea.  Thanks so much for that.  I told you I wouldn’t be anywhere without you.”

“Right.  How are we going to do this Dean?” Castiel placed the mug by Dean’s plate.

“Well.  She thinks that we’re engaged that’s all.  We don’t really have to change anything.  You know me well enough to answer any of her questions.  I’m not worried.”

“What if she asks questions about our wedding?  How do I answer those?” Castiel sat across from him.

“Well just tell her you haven’t started planning yet.”

“Hold on,” Castiel narrowed his eyes, “me?  Why am I the one planning the wedding?”

“I figured you’d be better at it.  You have the party planning in you.  Remember my thirtieth?  You put that all together.  It was wonderful.  Or my parents anniversary.  Mom loved it.  It’s in you.”

“I feel like I am being pushed into every gay stereotype this evening,” Castiel shook his head as he sipped his coffee, “but I really cannot allow you to do major planning or else we would be having it at a diner with pie instead of cake.  Yes, I will plan the fake wedding.  I am more equipped.”

“See,” Dean smiled.

“When are we going to tell Sam, Gabe and Jess?  Also your parents.  If Mary finds out through someone else she will be livid.”

“I guess we can tell mom and Mark this weekend.”

“What about your dad and Kate?”

Dean rolled his eyes and sighed, “I guess we can tell them too.  They won’t be at the barbeque so I’ll send him a text.”

“Your mother is going to chew you out for this fake wedding.”

“Not if I don’t tell her that it’s fake,” Dean stared at his plate.

“Dean,” Castiel gave him a pointed look, “we are not lying to your parents.”

“What about your parents?”

“We haven’t heard from them since last Christmas so I am not worried about them.  I will not lie to Mary.  We need to tell them the truth.  That way it isn’t a surprise when we do not get married.”

“But then my mom is gonna yell at me for lying,” Dean pouted.

“You have to deal with the consequences of your actions.”

“Hey you said that you were thinking about offering it anyway,” Dean pointed his fork at him.

“Yes well that was before.  I would have told the others before I offered it to you,” Castiel sipped his coffee and avoided Dean’s eyes.

“I see,” Dean watched him, “you really would have offered?”

“Yes Dean.  I know how much you would like to have a child.  If I get the offer for DC it would make sense for me to move in with you anyway.  If I was to commute that is.  Then we wouldn’t really live together.  I’d spend half my time in another city and your life wouldn’t change,” Castiel stared into the mug as if it held the answers to all his problems.

“You thought about it.”

“Yes.”

“Cas,” Dean sighed.

“Yes Dean?” Castiel looked up expectantly.

“Never mind.  Here,” Dean pulled out his wallet and handed him a card, “that’s Missouri’s contact information.  You should call her soon to set up the interview and evaluation.”

“Of course.”

“What happens if you take the position at the university?” Dean asked after a few heavy minutes of silence.

“Then you will have a new roommate.  We don’t have to share a bed Dean.  I can move into one of your guest rooms.  We would only share a bed if we had guests over or an inspection.  I will keep clothes in the other closet and a book or two to make it look like I stay there all the time.  I have so much stuff that we had to set up the guest room for the rest of my things.  It’s logical,” Castiel sipped his coffee and stared at the counter top.

“You really did think about it,” Dean smiled.

“You are aware that I must have everything organized and planned out or else I get anxious.”

“Yeah.  Thank you for not calling me out yesterday.  I appreciate you going along with this.  I owe you a lot.”

“You do,” Castiel nodded.

“You wanna watch a movie or something?” Dean put his fork down on the empty plate.

“That would be fine.  I’ll make you some more coffee.  Go put something in.”

“Alright.”

Castiel watched Dean walk away.  Castiel closed his eyes and took a deep breath. _What the hell am I thinking?_

<<<<>>>> 

Castiel watched as Dean lit the barbeque pit in Sam’s backyard.  He spotted Gabriel and Jess as they put out the fruit salad and punch.  Gabriel kissed Jess and Castiel felt his heart warm at the sight of the untraditional love.  He watched as Sam walked up and kissed both Gabriel and Jess’ cheek as he walked pass on his way to Dean.  Castiel sipped his beer and turned to the patio as the door slid open again.  He froze as Mary and Mark walked through the door.  Mary’s face was set in a grimace.  She made eye contact with Castiel and headed straight for him.  She waved Mark off.  Castiel swallowed and hoped that it was something else.

“When were you going to tell me?” Mary stopped in front of Castiel and crossed her arms, “I would expect this from Dean but not you Castiel.  You and I have always had an open relationship.”

“Um.  I am not sure what you are talking about Mommy Mary.”

“Don’t you Mommy Mary me young man,” Mary pointed at him and narrowed her eyes, “you’re engaged to my son and you thought that you could keep it from me.”

“Crap,” Castiel wiped a hand over his face.

“Oh yeah crap,” Mary threw her arms in the air, “you think you can marry my boy and not tell me,” her voice began to rise.

“Mary let’s talk inside where we can have some privacy,” Castiel forced a smile and touched her arm.

“Oh no you don’t young man,” Mary pursed her lips and crossed her arms again, “Dean Jonathan Asher Winchester!” she turned around and faced the rest of the family.

Dean froze with the fire poker mid air.  He turned slowly with wide eyes.

“I swear it was Sam’s fault,” Dean responded automatically.

“We’re not 10 anymore,” Sam rolled his eyes.

“How dare you get engaged without telling your mother,” Mary marched over Dean.

“What?” Gabriel and everyone turned to Dean.

“You’re engaged?” Jess asked shocked, “who’re you even dating?”

“See,” Dean blushed and turned back to the pit to make sure the fire was even before he put the poker down.

“Yes.  Please explain it to your mother before I have to hear about it again,” Mark nodded.

“I am engaged to Cas sorta,” Dean flinched.

“Cas?” all eyes turned to Castiel.

“Hello,” Castiel waved nervously.

“What do you mean sorta?” Mary shot him a look that made his skin run cold, “I had to hear this from a woman in my office.  She heard it from the agency.  Missouri Moseley was excited about the new couple that she had been given.  She talked about their charming house and the beautiful blue eyed man that was shy about affection.  Imagine my surprise when I am told it is my very own son and his best friend.”

“When did this happen?” Sam asked happily.

“Congrats!” Gabriel grinned.

“Well with Gabe getting the new place and me getting the inspection I kind of forgot.  But it isn’t real.”

“What do you mean it isn’t real?” Mary took a step closer with her lips in a thin line.

“I’m gonna go get the burgers to put on the grill,” Sam turned and went back into the house.

“I’ll help with the other sides.”

“I’ll go supervise,” Gabriel followed Jess and Sam into the house.

“Yeah,” Mark snuck away as well.

“Dean what is going on here?” Mary let out a sigh and dropped her arms.

“Dean didn’t want to tell you,” Castiel stepped around her to Dean, “he had only just asked right before the inspection.  You know we have done so much together and I was there for him the most when things did not work out before.  Somehow it just turned into something else,” he put his arm around Dean, “he feels that it isn’t real since he did not give me a ring.  I told him that I do not need one,” he chuckled and leaned his head on Dean’s shoulder.

“Oh,” Mary’s expression softened, “you wanted to keep it secret until you had given him a ring to prove your claim.  That is so romantic,” she pulled them both into a hug.

“Yeah,” Dean’s eyes flitted back and forth as he tried to swallow down his panic.

“Then with Gabe getting his place you didn’t want to out shine him.  You two are so thoughtful.  So sweet.  I knew you two would eventually see it,” she ruffled their hair and went to the cooler and grabbed a soda.

“Right.  Hold on what do you mean see it?” Dean eyed his mom.

“Honey,” Mary giggled, “you two are made for each other.  We all always thought you two would end up together.  We just weren’t sure when you would see it.  The way you two look at each other is the same way Mark looks at me.  You belong together.”

Castiel and Dean stared at each other.

“See that look right there,” Mary signaled the others that it was safe.

“We’re so glad you two stopped waiting for the other to realize how much you loved him.  Congrats,” Mark slapped Dean on the back, “took you long enough son.”

“Uh thanks,” Dean smiled as the blush dusted over his face.

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell us,” Sam sat the plate of burgers down and hugged Dean to him, “you’re finally gonna be part of the family for real,” he hugged Castiel tighter.

“Yes.”

“Little brother,” Gabriel shook his head as he pushed Sam out the way.

“Sorry we didn’t share,” Castiel chuckled nervously.

Dean manned the grill as everyone talked about the pending wedding and Gabriel’s renovations.  Dean took the dirty plates that had the raw meat into the kitchen and was followed by Castiel.  He rinsed off the plates and when he turned he was met with Castiel’s stern face.

“I lied to your mother,” Castiel huffed, “your mother.  I told you I didn’t want to but you wouldn’t come clean.  I have never lied about anything to your mother.  Not even when we were kids Dean.”

“I know Cas.  I am so sorry.  I froze.  I panicked and didn’t know what to say.  I tried.  I started off right but then I bailed.”

“Yes you did,” Castiel leaned against the counter, “I did the interview and evaluation yesterday.  I have lied more in the last week than I have my entire life.  Now I have lied to a woman that helped raise me.  Dean I do not like this feeling at all.  Now I have to smile and take the congratulations.  Do you know what will happen to me if this gets out at work?”

“Calm down.  We’ll handle this okay?”

“I need to lie down,” Castiel pushed pass Dean and headed to the living room.

Dean watched Castiel trudge off to the couch to lie and his heart felt heavy.  Dean sighed and grabbed the hotdogs and went back outside.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not going to lie, I don't know how often I am going to update this. I am trying to update as regularly as possible. At least every two weeks if not more. I no longer have a beta so I tend to sit chapters aside then come back to them fresh to make corrections. This is the last chapter that I had already written. It will have updates though. I am not forgetting it. Thanks for everyone leaving comments, reading, leaving kudos and all that jazz. I love you guys!
> 
> I was also shooting for five chapters but after charting it out it will be a little longer.


	4. Chapter 4

Dean put his bag and jacket in his locker and headed to the studio logs.  He flipped open the schedule and nodded as he went over his list of work for the day.

“Hey there Dean,” Benny entered the office with a huge grin.

“What did you do?” Dean glanced at him from the assignment sheet.

“I heard something that I don’t know whether I should believe it or not,” Benny leaned against the desk.

“Just spit it out already.  You have that shit eatin’ grin that I don’t trust.”

“You're engaged brother,” Benny crossed his arms and smirked at Dean.

“Shit,” Dean put the folder back on the desk and took a deep breath, “yes.  Cas and I are engaged.  How the hell did you find out?”

“You think that something that big is gonna stay secret?  C’mon brother.  You should know by now that if one of the most eligible bachelors gets engaged it’s all over the place.  Dean everyone wants you.  You are a legend.  Women get wet when they hear your name and men are hard the second they see those green eyes of yours.  When you swing both ways you break hearts on both sides of the fence.”

“Jesus Benny,” Dean ran a hand over his face, “you make it sound like I am some sorta sex god.”

“People talk Dean.  They know you take care of your partners.  It’s hard to find a good man like that,” Benny winked and picked up the assignment folder.

“Dammit.  I didn’t want it to get out like this.  Who told you?”

“The bartender at Phoenix Afternoon.”

“How the hell did she find out?  Good grief,” Dean tugged at his hair and let out a shaky breath.

“Don’t know.”

“I have to let Cas know,” Dean pulled out his phone.

“Why are you so bothered?  This is great.  You guys should have done this a long time ago.”

“What do you mean?” Dean looked up from his text.

“Dean,” Benny slapped him on the back, “have you seen you two together?  It’s a wonder that it took you this long to ask.”

“Who said that I asked?”

“Because Castiel would have made an event of it.  He goes big or stays home.  You are the one that likes things low key,” Benny looked down at the assignment sheet for his day.

“Cas is going to kill me,” Dean finished typing out his text and sent it.

“Why?”

“This isn’t how we really wanted this to go.  How the hell did it even get out?  Only our family knew.”

“Including Gabriel?” Benny pointed out.

“Oh shit.  Gabe,” Dean threw his hands in the air, “of course.  There is no bigger gossip.  Dammit.”

“Yeah.  Well it looks like I have some bass to put down so I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah man.  See ya.”

Dean typed out another text to Castiel to let him know how he thought that it had spread.  Dean did not expect an immediate response because Castiel had gone into the Garrison Firm for them to let him know about his next assignment. 

Dean took a deep breath and headed to the studio for the piano that he had to do.  He waved to the engineer and sat down at the piano.  They talked over the arrangement for a few minutes then Dean began to play.  He closed his eyes and let the music take him.

 

Castiel smiled and shook hands with his boss.  Castiel went to his office and sat the folder for his next assignment on the desk.  He let out a deep sigh and pulled his phone from his drawer.  He clicked on the new messages and read through them. 

“Dammit Gabriel,” Castiel put down his mobile and picked up his office phone.

“Hey there brother of mine,” Gabriel answered cheerfully.

“You are dead,” Castiel all but growled into the receiver.

“What did I do now?” Gabriel asked expectantly.

“Who did you tell about Dean and me?”

“Oh.  I was proud of you guys.  I told like everybody man,” he chuckled, “I had to get the word out.  It’s an awesome thing.  Why?  Was I not supposed to?”

“It was something that we were waiting on.  We were going to do it proper and put an announcement in the paper like everyone else.  Now everyone knows,” Castiel leaned back in his chair.

“Sorry I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay I guess.  It’s too late to do anything about it anyway.”

“So is there gonna be an engagement party?  I could let you guys get one of the back rooms and make a special menu for you and everything.”

“Actually that sounds lovely.  I will get back to you with details.”

“Spectacular.”

“I got my next assignment today.”

“You’re off to DC then?”

“No.  They have given me an assignment at the university,” Castiel chuckled.

“What?” Gabriel laughed along with him, “do they know that they offered you a position?”

“They do now.  They were not even upset.  My boss said that if it works out they will just extend the contract.  I would get double the pay for the same work.”

“Wow.  That’s awesome news.  I know Dean will be ecstatic.”

“Why?” Castiel squinted.

“Dude you’re staying in the city.  You think your fiancé really wanted to have you half time?”

“Oh yes right,” Castiel nodded even though he couldn’t see him.

“You have to get used to thinking about the two of you now.  Your decisions are going to affect him.  It isn’t just about you anymore.”

“I guess you’re right.”

“I am.  Well I have to go now.  Don’t forget to call me about the details for the engagement party.”

“Will do.  Talk to you later.”

“Later days.”

Castiel hung up and groaned as he thought about his next call to Dean.  Castiel glanced at the clock and knew that Dean would still be in session so he just sent him a quick text to let him know to call as soon as he was available.

 

Dean pulled on his jacket and headed out of the studio.  He checked his messages and groaned when he saw the one from Castiel.  He took a deep breath and put his wireless device in his ear.  Castiel had made him get it to be more careful while he was driving.

“Dean.  I’m glad you got my message.  I talked to Gabriel and he apologized for telling everyone.  We didn’t really tell anyone that they could not tell anyone.”

“Yeah I know but now Benny knows and you know how he is,” Dean replied as he started his car and pulled out of his spot.

“He’s giving you a hard time?”

“Yeah.  Apparently I have some sort of sex god reputation that I was not aware of.  People are upset that I’m gonna be off the market,” Dean laughed.

“Hm.  We didn’t think of that.  I guess you cannot bring someone home if they think that you’re engaged.  I’m sorry.  You’re going to have to go through this.  Though this is your fault so I’m not that sorry,” Castiel smirked.

“You’re something else fiancé,” Dean chuckled.

“Gabriel wants to throw us an engagement party.”

“Might as well.”

“Something big or just family?”

“I say close friends and family.”

“Good that means I don’t have to invite people from work.”

Dean laughed harder than before, “there isn’t anyone that you like at the firm?”

“I am friendly with them as expected but there is no one that is more than an associate.”

“Wow.  I’m gonna invite a few.”

“I am guessing you will invite Jo and Benny which means that you have to invite Ellen as well.”

“Yup.  You make the list and I will make the invites.”

“Can I trust you with that?”

“Yes.”

“Alright then.  How about,” he can hear Castiel flip through his calendar, “the end of the month?  There’s a Saturday that we are both free.  The 29th would be perfect.”

“That works.”

“Alright.  I will let Gabriel know to reserve the room for that day and get back to him in a week and a half with numbers.  That should be enough time for people to RSVP.”

“Sounds good.”

“Great.  Are we still on for dinner?”

“Yes. Hold on I’m getting another call.”

“Okay.”

Dean tapped the button to switch calls.

“This is Dean.”

“Hello Dean. How are ya?” Missouri greeted cheerfully.

“I am doin’ well Mrs. Moseley.  How ‘bout yourself?”

“Doing great thanks.  I am calling to see if we can set up a time for you and Castiel to meet with a few of us to do a couples interview.”

“Oh well,” Dean swallowed, “of course.  This week is kinda swamped can we set something up for the beginning of next week?”

“Of course.  How about Tuesday afternoon about three?”

“That’s perfect.  Should we meet at your office or the main office?”

“Oh we’ll be coming to your house.  We would like to observe you guys and talk candidly.  Nothing too formal.”

“Oh of course.”

“I am so glad that we’re able to make this work.  I look forward to seeing you then.  Have a good day.”

“You as well.  Bye-bye.”

“Bye dear.”

Dean clicked back over.

“Cas, you still there?”

“Yes.”

“When do you start the new job?”

“Two weeks why?”

“Missouri needs to do another interview with us together.”

“What?”

“Yeah.  Tuesday at the house at three.  Something informal.”

“Dean.”

“Don’t panic,” Dean’s voiced pitched higher.

“You’re panicking, why can’t I?”

“Because you will hyperventilate and I am drivin’ so I can’t come help you.”

“Dammit Dean.”

“I know,” Dean sighed.

“I cannot talk to you right now. I’ll be at your place this evening for dinner.”

Dean heard the click as Castiel slammed his phone down and hung up on him.

 

Dean made Castiel’s favorite dishes and had it all lain out when Castiel arrived.  Castiel let himself in and headed straight to the wine rack after he looked over the food.  He opened the wine and poured himself a glass then made his plate.  He sat at the table and began to eat. 

“So this is how it’s gonna be?” Dean rolled his eyes and made his own plate and sat across from Castiel.

“Dean I am so very upset with you but I am also hungry.  I just cannot believe this.  It has gotten so out of hand,” Castiel sighed.

“I know,” Dean sipped his beer.

“Your mother called and wanted to know when I was going to start coming back to family dinners.  She didn’t want to pressure me before but now that I am going to be part of the family permanently she will not take work for an excuse.  She expects me there every dinner.  I haven’t been at every dinner since I finished grad school,” Castiel cut his eyes at Dean while he ate.

“I know.  I know this is more than we initially expected but we can work this all out.  We’re the dynamic duo, Dean and Cas, Cas and Dean so we got this,” Dean smiled.

“We do not have this Dean.  It is blowing up and out of proportion.  I don’t know if I can continue to lie like this to everyone Dean.”

“Cas, please just for a little while longer.  It’s just until we get it together and I get a little one here.  Then you can take the job in DC and stay there.  You can come by on weekends and all that when you have the time.  You won’t have to be here all the time.”

“Dean,” Castiel looked down at his plate, “I got placed at PRU.”

“Oh.”

They finished the meal in silence then cleared the dishes and put away leftovers in a deeper silence.  Dean watched as Castiel headed to the front door.  He ran a hand through his hair and grabbed a beer.  When he heard the door open again he turned surprised and saw Castiel with a box and a duffle bag.

“If we are supposed to be sharing this space I figured there should be more of my things here,” Castiel pulled a few pictures from the box and placed them around the living room.

Dean smiled and walked over.  He peeked into the box and smiled at the randomness of the items.

“The afghan that you made in 11th grade?” Dean pulled it from the box.

“Yes,” Castiel took it from him and spread it across the back of the couch, “it brings the room together.”

“We are not using these cutesy little kitten salt and pepper shakers,” Dean sat his beer down and picked up the shakers.

“They were given to me by your mother so we are,” Castiel snatched them and took to the kitchen.

“This painting is creepy.”

“You painted that for me,” Castiel laughed.

“Yeah and it was just as creepy then.  What the hell was I thinking about?  Demons and angels,” Dean shivered at the image of the black eyed demon and blue eyed angel, “I was like 19.  You should have told me to take it and burn it.”

“Hey it got you an A in that class.”

“You are not putting that up in here,” Dean protested as he saw Castiel go to the mantel.

“Why not?”

“Creepy remember?”

“Fine.  I’ll put it in the office.”

“Okay.  I can swing with that.  What’s in the duffle bag?”

“A few clothing items.  If we’re together I should have a few things here don’t you think?”

“Yeah.  I guess that’s true.  You have the other half of the second closet.”

“Other half?  Did you spread into the second closet?”

“Maybe,” Dean looked to the floor.

“I will be getting rid of some stuff for you.  You should not have that much stuff Dean.”

“Yes honey,” Dean grinned.

“This is going to be a challenging marriage I can already tell,” Castiel slung the bag over his shoulder and lifted the box and headed upstairs, “oh and we also need to kiss.”

Dean almost choked on the sip he had taken of his beer.

“What?” Dean followed Castiel.

 “You caught me off guard last time.  I was not prepared.  We don’t want to seem awkward.  We should get used to showing affection to one another.”

“Yeah sure that makes sense.”

“Good.”

Castiel pushed open the door to Dean’s bedroom and went straight to the closet that was half empty.  Dean watched him as he hung a few shirts and a jacket inside.  Castiel took the shoes and extra items that Dean had put in there out. Castiel looked over his shoulder and shook his head.

“What?  There was no one to share with,” Dean shrugged and made space in his closet.

“That was the point.  It was to be empty so that you would find someone to fill it.  It was a mental exercise.  It kept it on your sub conscious.  I will also need a drawer to put my underwear and pajamas,” Castiel advised as he hung his pants.

“Right,” Dean went over to his dresser and tried his hardest not to let the tightness in his chest get worse.

“I am going to put up the other pictures on this side of the bed.  Is that okay?”

“How,” Dean turned to face Castiel, “do you know which side I sleep on?”

“Best friend remember?” Castiel put his things on the left side.

“I thought you always liked the right side,” Dean opened a drawer and began to pull his stuff out.

“I do.  The right when we’re lying down.  You are facing the bed so it is the left to you but once we’re in bed it will be the right.  Like stage left and stage right.  Oh no,” Castiel inhaled sharply, “will we have to actually share a bed?”

“What?  When?” Dean placed the tee shirts he removed in another drawer.

“Ever?  What happens on family vacations?”

“Dude, we’ll get there when it happens.  Missouri isn’t gonna watch us sleep so I don’t care about that right now.  Plus it ain’t like we haven’t shared a bed before.”

“Right,” Castiel nodded and placed the now empty box in the bottom of his closet.

“Here’s a drawer,” Dean tapped on the edge and moved away so Castiel could put his things in it.

“Thanks,” Castiel lifted his things from the duffle and placed them neatly in the drawer then closed it, “there.  Now it looks like I live here.”

“Yup,” Dean stepped into his space.

“Dean,” Castiel whispered as Dean leaned in.

Dean cupped Castiel’s jaw as he pressed their lips together.  It was slow and tender.  Castiel felt the tingles shift through him as Dean moved closer and parted his lips.  Castiel moaned and placed a hand on Dean’s hip.  Dean pulled back slowly then leaned in and placed two chaste kisses on his lips then stepped back.

“That was very,” Dean cleared his throat and prayed Castiel wouldn’t look down, “convincing.  I believed it.  I think others will too.”

“Yes,” Castiel brushed his hand over his face and blinked slowly, “yes that was very good.”

“I liked the little moan.  That was perfect,” Dean licked his lips and rubbed his neck.

“I, um, I am gonna go,” Castiel pointed to the door and rushed out it.

Dean took a deep breath and followed.

“I have a thing in the morning and I have to get rest for that thing,” Castiel grabbed his keys and jacket.

“Yeah sure,” Dean walked him to the door.

“See ya later,” Castiel gave him a weak smile before he was out the door.

Dean closed the door and leaned against it.

“Why can’t I just tell him that I’m crazy for him?” he mumbled as he lifted his hand to his lips.

  


 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for the next chapter, we are going to be reminded of John Winchester's parenting skills once he was separated from Mary. I will put a warning at the beginning of the next chapter as well but just wanted to give a heads up.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As a reminder this is not 100% happy chapter. The beginning and the end is a little rough but the middle is really good! Also recreational drug use. I know it's in the tags but just wanted to remind you.

_Dean grabbed Sam and pulled him down the hall of the base apartment.  Dean hushed him again as he slid open the loose boards in the closet to reveal the cubby he had made.  Dean made sure Sam had a blanket and a snack before he put the boards back in place and shuffled his dad’s clothes back in place.  Dean went back to his bedroom that he shared with Sam and sat down at the desk.  He picked up his pencil and worked on his math._

_“Where the hell are you?” John’s slurred speech carried through the mostly empty apartment as the front door slammed shut._

_Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath.  He focused on his homework and tried not to let the tension show when the door to the room was flung open._

_“Where’s your brother?” John staggered into the room._

_“He’s at a friend’s house.  Remember you told him he could go after school to work on his project,” Dean lied knowing that his father wouldn’t remember._

_“Oh yeah.  Forgot,” John leaned against the doorframe, “why aren’t the chores done?  The trash hasn’t been taken out and there’s still dishes in the sink boy.”_

_“I know s-sir.  I have a lot of homework.  I-I will get it done after.  Promise.”_

_“You shoulda done it first,” John dropped the half empty bottle of vodka on the floor and unbuckled his belt._

_Dean slid the boards back and Sam crawled out.  Sam bit his lip and said nothing of the welts and bruised cheek that Dean had.  Dean bent down and slipped shoes onto Sam and tied them.  Sam took the backpack from Dean and climbed out the window and went around front._

_“Dean I’m home.  I finished the project,” Sam opened the door and walked in with a forced smile, “oh hey dad.  I thought you were going to be late tonight.”_

_“They let me out early so I went to the bar with some of the fellas,” John stumbled over to Sam and ruffled his hair._

_“I see.  Where’s Dean?” Sam swallowed hard._

_“In the bedroom.  He’s grounded.”_

_“Oh.  Okay.”_

_“You doin’ alright Sammy?” John asked as he took a sip from a mug._

_“Yeah.  Just working hard in school and stuff.  I’m gonna go put my stuff in the room.”_

_“Alright.  I’m gonna walk to the store.  Need to get some milk for your cereal in the mornin’.  Let the boy know,” John slipped on his shoes._

_“Okay,” Sam watched him loop the belt back through and closed his eyes as he went up the hall._

_Sam hesitated as he heard the heart wrenching sobs of his older brother.  He took a deep breath and pushed the door to their room open.  Dean quickly wiped his face and stood at attention.  He relaxed when he saw that it was just Sam._

_“He went to the store,” Sam mumbled and dropped his backpack on the floor._

_“Okay.  I better get the chores done before he gets back,” Dean moved to walk passed Sam._

_“I’ll do them you finish your homework,” Sam stepped in front of him._

_“No.”_

_“Dean.”_

_Sam hugged his brother and tried to ignore the flinching as he wrapped his arms lightly around him.  Dean wept as Sam held him._

_“Why?  You can’t keep taking this Dean,” Sam said softly._

_“I’m bigger Sammy.  I’m supposed to watch out for you.”_

_“But Dean,” Sam swallowed, “it’ll be easier if it’s spread between us.”_

_“Never Sam,” Dean pulled his brother tight, “never while I can take it.  I love you Sammy and I will never let you go through this.”_

_“I love you too.  At least we get to go to mom’s next weekend.  You’ll be safe.”_

_“Yeah.”_

Dean’s eyes flew open.  He immediately checked his arms and cupped his cheek.  It took a few minutes for him to realize it was a dream.   He wiped away the tears and choked back the sob that threatened to escape.  He rolled over to his side and touched the empty space to his right.  Not for the first time Dean wished Castiel was there.  Dean sighed and closed his eyes.  John’s arm pulled back with the belt twisted around his hand flashed in his eyes.  Dean groaned and pushed the covers back.

After a hot shower and a Xanax Dean walked down to his kitchen.  He turned on the coffee pot where he had already measured out the coffee the night before.  He made himself breakfast and sat at the counter.  Dean’s eyes flicked to the clock and decided it wasn’t too early anymore.  He grabbed the cordless off the wall and hit speed dial.

“Dean,” Castiel panted into the phone.

“Uh,” Dean chuckled, “did I interrupt something?”

“Morning workout you idiot not sex,” Castiel chugged loudly from his water bottle.

“Oh okay,” Dean closed his eyes and tried not to imagine sweaty and half naked Castiel, “can you uh . . . you know what, never mind.  I shouldn’t’ve called.  I’m sorry.”

“No Dean.  I’m up.  Do you need me to come over?” Castiel’s voice was laced with worry.

“Please,” Dean all but whimpered, “I had a bad dream.  I need,” he sniffled, “I just need--”

“I’ll be there soon,” Castiel cut him off, “I’m going to have to shower at your place though.  I’m closer there than I am my place.”

“Thank you,” Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“I do expect coffee and food.”

“Of course.”

“See you soon.”

“Yeah.”

Dean smiled softly at the phone and sat it on the counter.  He got up and made a full pot of coffee.  He made Castiel a plate and put it in the warmer.

“I’m going to shower quickly then I will be right back,” Castiel called as soon as he arrived.

“Okay,” Dean called back.

Dean gave him a few minutes then poured a tall mug of coffee and added a teaspoon of creamer and two splendas.  He pulled the plate from the warmer and sat it on the table then refilled his own mug.  Castiel bounced down the stairs a minute later with a towel around his head.

“Remind me to get a haircut before Tuesday.  Thanks,” Castiel sat down and looked Dean over, “oh shit.  John?”

“Yeah,” Dean held the mug between both hands and stared into it, “I’m gonna pull my application.  You won’t need to worry about Tuesday.  I should never be a parent.  I’m so worthless.”

“Dean,” Castiel pushed the plate aside and took hold of Dean’s hand, “we’ve been through this, remember?  You are not your father and never will be.  You were more of a man at 17 than he ever will be.”

“Cas you can’t really say that.  I could change when there’s a little life here.  I shouldn’t have children.  What the hell possessed me to think I deserve that?” Dean frowned and pulled his hand from Castiel’s.

“Dean Jonathan Asher Winchester, you will listen to me,” Castiel used his finger tips to tilt Dean’s head up, “I don’t know what the hell has gotten into you but no matter what your past is you are worthy to share your love.  That was just a dream.  You are feeling vulnerable right now.  You will not talk about yourself like this.  Do you understand me?”

“Yes,” Dean stared wide eyed as Castiel.

“Good.  You’re a great man and never forget that.  Now I’m going to finish breakfast and we’re going to go shopping.  There are few things I’m going to need to throw a good luncheon in two days.  Get pen and paper I want to make a list,” Castiel rubbed the towel over his head then pulled it off and put it on the back of the chair.

Dean felt his chest loosen and the headache that had been about to make itself known dissipated.  Dean got up and grabbed the notepad from the counter and wrote down the items Castiel rattled off as he ate.

 

“And then I will need the can heat so I can make sure the meat balls stay warm but don’t dry out,” Castiel grabbed a stack of aluminum serving pans, “do you still have the Crockpot that Mary gave you?”

“Yes.  Plus the one you left at my house last time you brought over your buffalo chicken dip.”

“Great.  That means I won’t have to lug anything from the house after all.  Oh speaking of moving, have you cleared out the big guest room?” Castiel turned to him as he placed the racks in the cart.

“What are you talking about?”

“The guest room for me.  The lease is up at the end of the month so I told the firm not to worry about renewing it since I would be moving in with you.  Remember that we talked about this over a month ago.  The first time we saw Missouri.  We agreed if I didn’t go to DC that I would move in with you,” Castiel rolled his eyes and pushed the cart down the next aisle.

“Oh right,” Dean swallowed hard and followed behind Castiel.

“A week and a half is all you have left.  I want to be moved in before the engagement party,” Castiel grabbed sugar, flour and shortening from the aisle and quickly moved to the next.

“Jesus dude,” Dean jogged behind him, “are we in a rush?”

“No.”

“Then slow down.  I will have the room done in a couple of days.  We’ll make sure it’s in progress for when they come over Tuesday,” Dean looked down at the list and wondered why he made it since Castiel remembered everything.

“Good idea,” Castiel glanced around the aisle, “do you see evaporated milk?”

“I’ve got some at the house.  That’s why we didn’t include it on the pointless list,” Dean tucked the list in his pocket.

“Right.  Well, we have all the nonperishable items.  Now I need to get some meat and the cold items.”

Dean followed grateful that Castiel had shown up when he did and helped clear his mind.  He forgot how much an adventure shopping was with Castiel.  Dean leaned on the cart with his foot propped up on the little bar as Castiel argued with the seafood vendor about the freshness of his product.  He bit back his laugh as the vendor turned back and went through the door.  He came back with a new package of shrimp and crab meat.

“Thank you Gil.”

“I’ve missed you Cas.  I love this.  You make me feel so alive.”

“Tell Gladys I’ll be at tea Thursday and I’ll bring those cookies she likes.”

“Will do.”

Castiel placed the items in the cart and moved to the butcher.  Dean watched as the argument repeated but this time in German.

“You will be seeing more of me Franz.  I will be living closer to this side of town again.”

“Very good.”

“Why do they argue with you when they know they’re gonna give in?” Dean chuckled as they moved to the freezer sections.

“It’s fun.  It reminds them of the way the old markets used to be.  You just do not have the gams for it,” Castiel shrugged as he pulled a few things that he needed and added them to the already full cart.

“I guess.”

“They won’t have a new produce delivery until tomorrow so I will stop by here and pick up the fruits and vegetables tomorrow,” Castiel advised as they headed to the queue.

“Thank you for this,” Dean kissed his cheek and went to grab a newspaper.

Castiel blushed and gave a smile.

“Was that good?” Dean whispered when he returned.

“What?” Castiel’s brow creased.

“Did the kiss seem genuine?  I wanted to get some more practice in,” Dean put the paper on top.

“Oh,” Castiel looked down and nodded, “yes that was very good.  We should practice,” he began to place the items on the conveyer belt.

“Awesome,” Dean would never tell Castiel that he hadn’t realized he had done until he walked away.

“Hey guys,” Amara the cashier smiled at them, “I hear you guys are finally tying the knot.”

“Yeah,” Dean rubbed the back of his neck and shifted his weight.

“Yes we are.  We’re having an engagement party in a couple of weeks,” Castiel pulled one of the invitations that Dean had made from his bag and handed it to her, “you’re invited.  Please keep it quiet because we are only inviting our closest friends.”

“Oh Cas,” Amara took the invitation and tucked it in her apron, “thanks guys.  That means a lot.  It’s a secret I’ll keep.”

“Great.”

Amara rang them up and had them bagged according to Castiel’s normal requests.  Castiel kissed her cheek as Dean headed out to the car.

“That was really sweet,” Dean said as they put away the groceries once they were home.

“What was?” Castiel glanced at him as he put the refrigerated items away.

“That you invited Amara.”

“I see her outside of there you know.  She’s an assistant at the kennel and a member of my cross stitch class.  We’re closer than you think.”

“Oh I _didn’t_ know that,” Dean folded the canvas bags and placed them in the pantry. 

“Well now you know.”

“And knowing is half the battle,” Dean grinned.

“What?”

“Nothing.  Are there other things that I don’t know about you?” Dean moved to the next bags.

“I wouldn’t know since I’m not sure what you may not know,” Castiel chuckled.

“That’s true.”

“Thursday is dinner at your mom’s.  I picked up ingredients for a cake.  She really liked my rum cake.”

“That sounds good.”

“So this week we have the luncheon on Tuesday, Wednesday orientation for me, you have the jazz club Wednesday, Thursday dinner with the family and Friday night is date night for us.  It’s a pretty busy week and that doesn’t even include the day time stuff we have,” Castiel nodded as he mentally made a list of things he needed to accomplish before he went back to work.

Dean stared at Castiel in the middle of the kitchen as he finished putting away groceries and started lunch.  Dean listened to him as he went on about the week and ordinary things.  He gripped the counter as everything grew muffled and blurred.

“Cas,” Dean gasped and closed his eyes.

Castiel turned, “yes Dean?” he dropped the pan and rushed to Dean’s side, “Dean!  Dean, can you hear me?”

Dean blinked rapidly and one hand clung to his chest as white noise filled his head.  He felt as if his stomach was on vibrate and he couldn’t catch a breath.  Dean felt his legs go from under him and Castiel’s arms tightened around him.

Castiel yelped as he caught Dean.  Castiel eased him to the floor.  He checked Dean’s pulse and lifted his eye lids.  Besides his rapid heartbeat everything was normal.  Castiel made sure Dean was flat on his back before he went to the sink.  He pulled open a drawer and got a wash cloth.  He took a deep breath and ran cold water over the wash cloth.  He wiped Dean’s face and sat by him.  Castiel checked his pulse again after a few minutes.  He gave a sigh of relief.  Castiel got up and went to the hall closet.  He grabbed the tackle box from the top shelf and sat it on the kitchen counter.

Dean groaned as consciousness returned a few minutes later.  Castiel helped him sit up and wiped his face one last time.  Dean blinked slowly and looked to Castiel then sniffed the air.

“Is that incense?”

“Yup,” Castiel stood and held out his hand.

“What happened?” Dean accepted the help.

“As far as I can tell you had a panic attack.  I caught you before you hit the floor.  You had grabbed the counter, your breathing was weird then you clutched you chest.  I am assuming your surroundings seemed to slip, your chest felt tight, and you felt like you couldn’t breathe.  Then you passed out,” Castiel helped him to the table and handed him a marijuana cigarette.

“You rolled me a blunt?” Dean laughed.

“You’re nervous and anxious.  This will help.  You light the incense while you smoke so that the skunkiness doesn’t stay in the air.  Unlike you mister scented candles,” Castiel teased as he flicked the lighter and held it out.

“Thanks,” Dean puffed and closed his eyes.

“It’ll make you feel better and it’ll make me believe I can leave you alone without worrying about you passing out again.  What brought it on?”

“Oh nothing.  Just the stress catchin’ up probably,” Dean looked away from Castiel and puffed a little more before he passed it to Castiel.

“You sure?  I want to make sure that you don’t have to worry about it again.”

“I’m sure.  Thanks.”

“Alright then,” Castiel passed back to Dean and got up and went to the kitchen area, “I’ll make lunch and we can sit down and plan out the luncheon.”

“Great,” Dean kept his eyes away from Castiel as he cooked.

<<<<>>>> 

Castiel removed the apron and looked over the spread of food.  He nodded to himself and folded the apron and put it away.  Dean jogged down the stairs as the door bell rang.  Castiel looked up even though he could not see him from that far in the house.  Castiel took a breath and rubbed his sweaty palms on his thighs. 

“It wasn’t too bad at all.  I just have to remember not to let Bobby drive us,” Missouri teased as they entered.

“I’m a respectable driver thank you very much,” Bobby rounded the corner and put his thumbs through his belt loops.

“Sure Bobby,” Tamara rolled her eyes as she followed in behind Bobby but in front of Dean.

“H-hello everyone,” Castiel cupped his hands in front of him and put on a smile.

“Oh wow.  This is real food,” Bobby grinned, “no dainty little cookies and tiny ass tea cups.”

“Bobby,” Missouri shot him a look.

“Hey you said informal,” Bobby shrugged as he eyed the food.

“Please help yourselves.  I wasn’t sure what we should have so I just made a little of everything.  I hope that no one has a food allergy,” Castiel smiled.

“Thank you so much,” Missouri put down her satchel, “this all does look wonderful.”

“Oh my, is that poached eggs and spinach on salmon?” Tamara’s eyes widened.

“Oh yes.   When I found out I was having someone from the UK over I made a few specialty items.  There is also chia chai butternut pudding and cheese rarebit with haddock.  I wanted to make sure that my spread was something that everyone would enjoy,” Castiel proudly smiled.

“This is more than expected,” Missouri replied as she washed her hands.

“Is that marmalade?” Bobby grinned as he made a plate.

“Yes,” Castiel chuckled, “it’s from my stash that I made last month.”

“Are you sure that you want to marry Dean?  I could use a second husband,” Missouri made her way back to the tables that Castiel had put up for the food.

“I appreciate the offer but Dean is my number one,” Castiel looked to the floor then over to Dean.

“I see what you mean Missouri,” Tamara giggled as she moved to the next table.

“I, um, I also made mimosas but I wasn’t sure if you could have any since you were on the clock.  There’s iced tea, lemonade, and cucumber water in the pitchers on the end.  I also have pop available and there’s a water cooler if you want regular water.”

“I think that we could have a mimosa and not interfere,” Bobby smiled.

“Great,” Castiel spun on heel and went to the refrigerator.

Dean stood back and took it all in.  He kept quiet and let Castiel do what he was born to do.  Dean waited for the others to make their plates and settle at the table before he moved to make a plate.  Castiel had out done himself and Dean was fully aware of that.

“This is so lovely.  I think this is my favorite house.  I do not want to go anywhere else,” Tamara voiced as she tucked into her food.

“Agreed.”

“Okay.  We are here with a purpose as well as to enjoy this fantastic meal,” Missouri opened her satchel and pulled out a tape recorder, “while we have our meal we will ask questions and just talk to get to know each other.  Since our hand won’t be free I’ll be recording it.  Is that alright dears?”

“Definitely,” Dean sat down.

“Of course,” Castiel placed a champagne flute by each person and got himself some food.

“Great,” Missouri made sure the tape was rewound and hit record, “this is the in home lunch with Dean Winchester and Castiel Anhel,” she went on to state a few other items to identify before she finished, “anything new that you would like to share with us today?”

“I got my next assignment,” Castiel answered as he made his way back to the table, “I will be taking up a spot at Parlor Rosemont University.”

“Oh excellent.  That must be very exciting.”

“It is in its own way.  I was looking forward to working with the Smithsonian because it has always been a dream but I am also glad that I can stay local.  It makes my move a lot easier as well.  Across town is better than out of the city,” Castiel smiled as he sat down.

“That’s right you will be moving in with Dean now,” Missouri chimed.

“Yes.”

“We’ve already begun to rearranging of the rooms,” Dean smiled as ate.

“Great.  I know you love your personal space so I’m glad that this is going over well for you.”

“Yup.  I’ll show you when I give Bobby and Tamara the tour.  It’s kind of in progress so you have to excuse the mess.”

“Excellent.”

“So,” Bobby took a sip of his drink then looked to Dean, “you work in the music industry.  How are the hours gonna effect your time home with a kid?”

“That’s the great thing about my job is I basically set my own hours.  I would move to a regular schedule for our child,” Dean silently congratulated himself for remember to include Castiel, “I would work while they were in school and pick them on the way home.”

“Hm.  What about the travelin’?  I know you sometimes go on tours with bands,” Bobby watched Dean closely.

“If the opportunity arose I have a great support network.  My brother Sam has no problem with babysitting while Cas is at work.  I wouldn’t really take a tour unless it was something that I couldn’t pass up.  If it’s in the summer then we make it a family vacation and little Johnny or Jill gets to come along.”

“Good.  Good,” Bobby turned back to his plate.

“Your brother Sam,” Tamara nodded as she worked on her phrasing, “is in a multiple person relationship?”

“Oh yes.  Jess, Gabe and Sam are getting married next year now that the laws have passed.  They are not conventional but the love is there and I couldn’t be happier for them.”

“Do they have any children of their own?”

“Not yet but they are discussing it.”

“Great.  Gabriel is your brother correct Castiel?” Bobby asked.

“Yes.  He is the second oldest.  Sariel my sister is the oldest and I am the youngest.”

“We have scheduled a meeting with Sariel for next week and with Sam and the others week after.  As you know we like to talk to the families at length,” Missouri said.

“Great.  We will be in touch with your parents soon as well,” Tamara added, “we are having a hard time reaching your father John though.”

“Oh,” Dean’s shoulders went tight, “you might have a better time calling Kate.  She usually plans everything and keeps his schedule.”

“Thank you.  We will do that.”

They talk and eat for the next couple of hours.  Once the food was done Castiel cleaned up while Dean showed them the house.  Missouri joined Castiel in the kitchen while Dean continued.

“This was a great afternoon.  Thank you so much.  You made everything?”

“Yes ma’am.  I have a thing about cooking,” Castiel smiled as he loaded the dishwasher.

“You know your way around the house pretty well.”

“Yes.  I have spent a lot of time here and now it’s going to be my home,” Castiel swallowed and avoided eye contact.

“I saw the announcement in the paper.  It was very nice.  I also hear that you guys had kept it secret.  Your soon to be mother in-law was surprised,” Missouri watched him carefully.

“Yes well,” Castiel closed the dishwasher and wiped down the counter, “with so much excitement going on in the family we wanted to wait.  We didn’t want to take anyone’s thunder you know.  Plus Dean still wants to get a ring.  He’s very old fashion that way.”

“I see.  Okay.  Very good.  You, uh, by chance wouldn’t have any more brownies?” Missouri looked sheepish.

Castiel laughed as he went to the cupboard.

“I may have made some yesterday and put some aside for you,” Castiel genuinely smiled at her as he handed her the container.

“You are heaven sent Castiel.  Thank you,” Missouri giggled and placed the container in her bag.

“I suggest keeping them hidden.  I feel Bobby might devour them.”

“He would in a second.”

“Missouri,” Castiel hesitated, “how quick does this process usually go?”

“We are fast tracking you two.  I still can’t believe it hadn’t happened earlier.  As they are probably telling Dean right now we will be sending you a list of counselors for you two to decide on.  It will be an ongoing process for you two.  There will be sessions every two weeks in the beginning but then it will be once a month.  To be honest I would expect a decision in a month maybe two and placement soon after.  In the end we have to let our head know our opinions and they will look at everything.  I have high hopes for you two,” Missouri smiled.

“Thank you,” Castiel beamed, “this has been a dream of Dean’s for a very long time.”

“Just Dean’s?”

“I,” Castiel clinched his jaw momentarily, “I was the one to talk to him about for so long.  I am ready.  I have been ready to share my life Dean and a child.  Dean is wonderful and bringing someone we can love together will only make this more of a home.”

“Very good,” Missouri smirked as she made her mental notes.

“Let me see this barbeque,” Bobby’s voice carried through the house as he clumped down the stairs, “Missouri talked highly of it.”

“Of course,” Dean chuckled, “you guys are always welcome over for food and drinks once you’re off the clock.  I grill a mean steak.”

“Boys,” Castiel and Missouri said simultaneously.

 

Dean flopped down in his favorite chair and Castiel was stretched out on the couch.

“That was exhausting but fun.  It wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be,” Dean hung his head back with his eyes closed.

“I agree.  It was rather pleasant.  I forget how much I love hosting.”

“Any more of that crab on toast stuff?”

“Crab bruschetta,” Castiel corrected with a sigh, “I can get it for you.  Just let me take a nap first.”

“Yeah.”

They both drifted off and only awoke when the doorbell rang.  Dean grumbled as he got up.

“You expect anyone?” Castiel yawned and stretched.

“No.”

Dean shuffled to the door as the bell rang again.  He peeked out the peephole and froze.

_I ain’t havin’ no faggot in my house.  You can go.  I don’t care and don’t you touch Sammy.  You leave him.  Don’t want you rubbin’ off on him._

Dean unlocked and opened the door.

“Dean my boy,” John greeted with a half smile.

“Hey.  What are you doin’ here?” Dean stared wide eyed at his dad then glanced back to the living room.

“I’m here to see my boy.  I had to hear through the grapevine that you were getting married.  I came to congratulate you,” John slapped his shoulder.

“Oh okay.”

“You should let me in boy,” the hint of smile dropped from John’s face.

“Oh.  Yes sir.  Come on in.”

“Good.  I haven’t seen the place since the renovations were done,” John looked around, “it looks good.  Kate is right behind me.  She was grabbing something from the car.”

“Okay,” Dean pulled the door back open and peered out.

“Sorry about that,” Kate smiled at Dean warmly, “so good to see you.  Oh my, your home is beautiful.”

“Thank you,” Dena shut the door and took a slow deep breath, “come on in,” he stepped around them to lead the way.

“Good wood work.  I can see the skill.  This is a great home.  I’m proud of you,” John nodded as his eyes roamed.

“We had a lunch today.  We have leftovers if you’re hungry.”

“We’re good.”

“Thank you dear.  We just came from dinner with my sister’s family,” Kate smiled.

“Hi John.  Hi Kate,” Castiel smiled as they entered the living room.

“You guys remember Castiel.”

“Cas so lovely to see you,” Kate gave him a hug.

“You as well Kate.”

“Castiel,” John nodded.

“John,” Castiel returned the nod.

“Oh here,” Kate held the large bag out to Dean.

“Thanks.”

“Where’s the lovely lady that has finally gotten your heart?” John asked as he looked around, “it’s about time to.  You’re not getting any younger.”

“We weren’t sure if you were having a party or not so we picked this up for you two.”

Castiel plastered the biggest brightest grin on as he took the bag from Dean.  It took all his might not to laugh.  He swallowed as he sat the bag on the table and began to pull the tissue paper out.

“Oh honey, they bought us gifts,” Castiel pitched his tone a little higher, “you guys are great.  That’s why I love this.  Gifts! I can’t wait to put the registry together.”

“What?” John frowned, “y-y-you’re marryin’ this one here?”

“Yes,” Dean’s eyes shifted around the room but never met John’s.

“Well I never,” John spun on heel and stormed from the room.

“I’m sorry,” Kate hugged Dean and pulled Castiel in as well.

“Kate!” John bellowed from the door.

“I’m sorry.  Keep in touch,” Kate scurried out the room.

The door slammed shut a few moments after.

“Dean,” Castiel put his arms around him.

“I’m an adult,” Dean shook as the sobs raked through him, “why can’t my decisions be accepted?”

“Shh.  Don’t let that asshole get to you.”

Castiel held Dean and let him cry on his shoulder as he rubbed his back.  Castiel wanted to chase after John and give him a word but knew it was better for him to be there for Dean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't hate me! I love you guys. I promise John eventually gets handled accordingly. I adore feedback and love kudos and comments. You guys have a fantastic week! Friday will be the update for In Touch with the Universe. I have a few things going on and that has taken some time away from completing that chapter.
> 
> Also, I know not all panic attacks are like that. I based Dean’s on my own. I'm sure everyone has different manifestations of panic and anxiety.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has not been beta read. I have read through to catch huge mistakes.

Dean continued to have dreams that rehashed his childhood.  Castiel had taken up the space in the guest room to make sure he was there when Dean woke scream or crying in then night.  Without words Castiel would comfort Dean then go back to his own bed.  Dean had grown accustom to that so when he woke and Castiel was not in there he felt the panic double. 

Dean stumbled from the bed and moved down the hall to Castiel’s room.  He pushed the door open and Castiel was there in the bed sound asleep.  Castiel had always woken up when Dean made any amount of sound.  Dean was about to shake him when he noticed a pill bottle on the side table.  He shuffled over to the table and picked it up.  It was a sleeping aid.  Dean frowned and turned back to Castiel.  Dean went back to his room and got under the covers.  He stared at the ceiling until his body forced itself into slumber.

The sun was up when Dean woke next.  He got ready for the day and headed downstairs.  Castiel was at the table with the paper open as he sipped his coffee.

“Morning,” Dean picked up the pot and poured himself a mug full of the expensive coffee Castiel had replaced his regular coffee with.

“There’s a plate in the warmer for you.  You looked so peaceful I did not want to wake you,” Castiel responded without looking up.

“Thanks.”

Dean grabbed the plate and went to the table with Castiel.  Dean watched Castiel while he ate.  Nothing seemed out of place but Dean knew something was wrong.

“I should have your room finished today.  By time you get from campus it’ll be up and ready.  Are you excited for your first day?”

“I think I am,” Castiel folded the paper, “I spent last week getting ready and now the day is here.”

“You were kind of crazy on Saturday so I’m glad to see you calm today.  You’ll be fine.”

“Yes I will.  It’ll be mostly getting to know each of the staff members then getting my office set up.  I should have done that last week.  I just stopped by and made sure my things were there.  I didn’t organize anything.  What was I thinking?”

“There was a lot last week.  I think the lunch through you off.  It’s okay.  You’ll be fine.  I bet you already have your office ideas mapped out and just need to execute them,” Dean sipped his coffee.

“Maybe,” Castiel looked away then back at Dean.

“That’s what I thought.  You’ll be fine.  I’ll even make you a great dinner to come home to.”

“I will won’t I?  Thank you Dean,” Castiel smiled, “I didn’t hear you last night.  Did you sleep okay?”

“Yeah,” Dean nodded and looked at his half finished plate, “like a baby.”

“Finally.  That’s good.  Well I have to run,” Castiel scooted his chair back and grabbed his lunch bag from the counter.

Castiel walked back to the table and kissed Dean’s cheek and headed to the front of the house.

“Uh, what was that for?” Dean looked wide eyed at Castiel.

“Practice,” Castiel hoped that the heat didn’t show on his face.

“Yeah practice,” Dean touched his cheek and gave him a lopsided grin.

 

“Oh god why did I do that?” Castiel mumbled as he crossed the campus to the administrative building, “I’m a crazy person.”

The entire commute to the university Castiel had let the moment play repeatedly in his mind.  It had just felt natural for him to kiss Dean before he left.  He shook himself mentally as he took the lift to his floor.

“Castiel great to see you,” Elizabeth, his assistant, stood and greeted him as he made his way to his office.

“Good morning Elizabeth.”

“The staff meeting is in an hour so you have time to get things figured out in your office.  I am sure you would like to get settled.”

“Thank you so much.”

“I also made sure that no one went in.  Not even the cleaning lady.  I didn’t want any of your things disturbed,” Elizabeth took her seat.

“Very good.”

Castiel placed his bag on the chair at his desk and glanced around at the few boxes he had sent over.  He closed his eyes mentally sorted through his planning memories until he remembered the plans he had set up.  Castiel hummed as he unpacked and got his office arranged how he wanted.  He smiled as he sat down and looked over the room thirty minutes later.

“There’s a call for you on line one.  Says his name is Dean Anhel, your husband,” Elizabeth announced over the intercom.

“Thank you,” Castiel hit the intercom then picked up the phone, “really?  You’re taking my last name?”

“Dean Jonathan Asher Anhel sounds very dignified,” Dean chuckled.

“I just left you an hour ago what happened?”

“I just wanted to wish you luck and to tell you to check your bag.  The front pocket.”

“My bag?” Castiel picked up his bag from the floor by his desk and unzipped the front pocket, “Dean,” he looked at the photo of them with Sam, Gabriel and Jess.

“I figured it would be good to have something to remind you that you’re loved and family to take care of you.  Don’t let anyone get to you.  You got this and you’re going to be fantastic.”

“Thank you so much,” Castiel smiled at the picture as he sat it up on his desk, “it brings everything together.”

“Good.  I hope today is an easy day.  I’ll see you for dinner.  Have fun.”

“Thanks again.  See you this evening.”

Castiel hung up and rubbed his temples.  He focused in on Dean’s face in the picture.  Castiel smiled weakly and tried to get the idea of a real marriage out of his mind.

“It’s all just pretend.”

 

Dean hung up the phone and sat back in the overstuffed chair in the entertainment room.  He stared at the phone before he sat it on the table.  He put his headset back on and picked up his controller and entered back into the video game he was playing.

“Jess, are you even paying attention?”

“Sorry Gabe was distracting me.  There’s a team across the way.  I’ll go into the church’s bell tower and snipe them while you head to the left.”

“On it.”

“So plans for the engagement party are going well?”

“Jess we’re in the middle of a game I don’t want to think about that.  Plus Cas is handling all of that.”

“He seems to be doing most of the work.  What exactly are you doing?”

Dean rolled his eyes and almost told Jess the truth.

“I’m tasting all the food and deciding on the cake.  We haven’t picked a caterer yet.  It’s a long way off so I don’t have much to do yet.”

“So you guys have set a date?”

“Thinking next fall,” Dean put out there randomly as he mashed the buttons on the controller.

“Sounds nice.”

“Yeah.  There’s two guys coming up on you, six o’clock.  I can’t make it there in time.  Go back up the tower.  Make them come to you.”

“See ‘em.”

Dean finished up his game with Jess and went up to the room that Castiel had settled in.  He had finished the painting but needed to remove the tape and put the furniture back in.  Dean sighed and got to work. 

Once finished with the arrangement of the room Dean moved Castiel’s bags and other boxes into the room.  He unpacked a few things but left most of it for Castiel to complete.  Dean showered and went back into the room.  He lay on Castiel’s bed with his face in the pillow and inhaled deeply.

“Oh my god.  I am one of those people,” Dean jumped up off the bed and rushed from the room.

Dean had settled down in the living room with a book when his mobile phone rang.

“Hey Jo what’s up?”

“Please tell me that I can stay with you for the next couple of days.”

“Uh okay.  Sure what’s goin’ on?” Dean marked his place and closed his book.

“Termites!  My fuckin’ house has termites.  Two to three days they’ll have to tent it.  I was gonna stay with mom but apparently when I moved out my room became an activities room.  I ain’t sleepin’ on no cot in the middle of scrap booking and beading crap.  Please, pretty please with sugar on top let me stay with you.”

“Alright.  I literally just finished a guest room.  The other one is actin’ as storage.  You can come over and stay.  Do you need help with anything?”

“Nope.  I got it.  I’ll be over this evenin’.  I can call the guys back and let them know they can come in and get this started today.  Thank you so much.  I’m sorry to be comin’ in on your honey moon period with Cas just movin’ in.”

“It’s not a problem.  Cas loves you,” Dean ran a hand through his hair, “he’s gonna be pissed that he has to share his space. That was supposed to be his little get away from me room,” he chuckled.

“Oh man.  I’m sorry.  But it’s only for a couple of days.”

“I’ll be sure to let him know.”

“Thanks again.  I’ll see ya.”

“Later.”

Dean hung up the phone and went back to reading.  He was through about half a page before the reality dawned on him.  He grabbed his phone.

**Dean: so uh Jo needed a place to stay so I said she could stay here.  Means we’ll be bunking together.  Just wanted to give you a heads up.**

Dean stared at the phone a minute before he hit send.  He jumped up and went to his room.  He pulled the comforter and sheets off the bed.  Dean went to his linen closet and grabbed clean sheets and remade the bed and made sure his room was picked up and took the other sheets to the utility room and out them in the washer.  Dean went back to his room and began to clean.  After he was done he took another shower and plopped down on the couch in the entertainment room and put on a movie.

 

Castiel entered his office at the end of his day and sorted out his agenda for the next day.  He began to pack up when his phone buzzed a reminder of an unread message.  He swiped his finger across the screen and read the message.  His mouth fell open and he flopped down in his desk chair.

_We’re going to have to share a bed._

**Castiel: Thank you for the heads up.  Do you need me to get anything?  Will she be bringing everything that she needs?  I am about to head home.**

Castiel felt the warmth wash over him as he thought of home with Dean.  Castiel packed his bag and headed out.  He locked his office and waved bye to Elizabeth as she took a call.  She nodded and he headed to the lift.

**Dean: neh she’ll have everything. She just actually pulled up.  See ya in a bit**

**Castiel: Alright.**

Castiel headed home and tried not to think about the sleeping arrangements.  When he arrived at the house he sat in the driveway for a while before he got the courage to go in.

“I’m home honey,” Castiel swallowed hard as he headed through the living room. 

“Hey Cas,” Jo waved and smiled as she set the table.

“Hello Jo,” Castile put his bag down and slipped off his jacket.

“How was work?” Dean asked as he finished cooking.

“Not so bad.  There aren’t that many projects going on right now so my load is light.  They actually needed more help with translations this time around.  Anything I can help with?”

“Nope.  I’m almost done here.  You go on and wash up.”

“Alright.  I’m going to change as well.”

“Oh yeah can you move a few things from the guest room?  I didn’t know what was for now and what would be put away so I kinda left everything there.”

“Sure thing.”

Castiel went upstairs to the guest room and looked around.  He was glad that Dean had put everything up but was upset that he wouldn’t get to enjoy it.  He grabbed the two suitcases and rolled them up the hall to Dean’s room.  Castiel left them in the closet and changed into a pair of lounge pants and tee shirt.  He walked back to the guest room and moved a few things around to make sure Jo would have plenty of space.  He headed back down to join them for dinner.  He washed his hands and sat at the table just as Dean placed a plate at his spot.

“So what’s going on with your place Jo?” Castiel asked as he opened the beer Dean had given him.

“Termites,” Jo frowned, “stupid fuckin’ critters.  First mice now this.  I swear they do this on purpose.  I shouldn’t have bought that house.  I knew it was too good to be true.”

“It’s your first place.  It happens.  You remember by first place,” Dean shuttered.

“Oh yeah.  That was a wreck.  I am glad that you got out of there.  You still rent it out?”

“Neh.  I finally sold it to settle this place.  I still own part of the land though so they pay rent for that and have to contact me about any changes to the land.  I’ll eventually sell that too.  I might have to depending on the wedding that this one here is plannin’,” Dean grinned.

“It’s going to be small.  It will not be expensive,” Castiel rolled his eyes.

“I might be leaving the studio,” Jo looked at her plate.

“What?”

“I got an offer to go on tour and become part of a band.  They need a drummer and a bassist.  I have a final audition next week.  I haven’t told any of the other guys.  You’re like family so I figured you should know.”

“Is it a band that I would know?”

“Fan Gauntlet.”

“Holy crap,” Dean put down his fork, “that is fantastic.”

“They are very popular Jo.  That is amazing.  I wish you luck with that.  That would be wonderful for you,” Castiel nodded.

“Yeah.”

“Does your mom know?”

“Not yet.  I’ll be gone for over six months.  I’m afraid she may freak.”

“Oh yeah Aunt Ellen is gonna freak the hell out.  Let me be there when you tell her,” Dean teased.

“Yeah I know.  That does mean that you’ll be getting more drum gigs.  You’re the second best drummer there.”

“They’ll hire someone to replace you.  I have been given a lot more piano work and guitar lately.”

“We’ll see.  Since I’ll be here a few days can you schedule your sex when I’m out of the house?  I do _not_ need to know you guys on that type of level.”

Castiel choked on the bite he had just taken.  He began to cough.  He threw his hands in the air and calmed himself as the food worked its way down.  Castiel took a gulp of the beer and cleared his throat.

“I promise you that you will not hear any sex,” Castiel took a deep breath.

“We’re not gonna be doin’ any of that.  Promise,” Dean cleared his throat, “we’re, uh, waitin’ until we’re married to pick it back up.”

“Oh my god are you serious?” Jo shot Dean a look of disbelief.

“Yes.  We want the wedding night to be special,” Castiel looked at his plate.

“I’m guessin’ that was your idea.”

“Why me?” Castiel narrowed his eyes and pouted.

“Because there is no way Dean would say an idea like that,” Jo laughed, “he couldn’t go a week without sex.”

“He has been very good.”

“Yeah okay.  I’m still a little shocked.  I mean, I knew you guys were in love but with as many skirts Dean’s been under I didn’t think he’d ever settle down.  Don’t get me wrong,” Jo gave Dean a look, “I love you but you’ve had more dick and pussy in your bed than a physician.”

“I know about my old reputation.  But Cas,” Dean looked at him softly, “there’s just something about him.  He’s different.  He makes me want no one but him.”

Castiel looked at Dean with his mouth open as if he were about to say something.  Dean just continued to look at him with the same soft expression.  Castiel swallowed and broke the eye contact.

“Wow that was some serious eye fuckin’.  No wonder you don’t need sex.  You just got off right there,” Jo laughed.

“Shut up Jo,” Dean looked back to his plate.

“Want to watch a movie after this?” Castiel asked.

“Sounds good.  Ooh you guys have that big ass TV so hell yeah.  Let’s make it an action flick.”

 

Dean panted as he tried to calm himself in the en suite of his room.  Castiel was in the shower in the hall bathroom as Dean got ready for bed.  Dean closed his eyes and leaned against the counter as he talked himself down.  He looked at his reflection.

“It’s just your best friend.  You’ve shared a bed before.  You can do this.  Just go out there, get in the bed, turn off the light and go to bed.  This is good.  When I have a nightmare he’ll be there.  I am going to be fine.”

Dean splashed cold water on this face and took a final deep breath as he dried off.  He opened the door and flipped the light off.  Castiel wasn’t in the room yet.  Dean sighed and went to his bed.  He got in and was about to turn off the lamp on his side when Castiel entered.  Dean was grateful that Castiel was in pajama pants and a tee shirt.

“I made sure Jo was fine before I came.  Do you want me to shut the door or do you prefer it open?” Castiel paused at the door.

“Closed please.”

Castiel closed the door and hung his robe on the hook in the closet door.  He stared at the floor as he made it to the bed.  He glanced up at Dean then pulled the covers back.

“Is it okay if I read?”

“Sure.”

“Okay.”

Castiel leaned against the head board and grabbed his book from the table.  Dean turned off his lamp and faced away from Castiel.  Castiel eyed Dean from the corner of his eye.  Castiel read the same page three times and had no idea what he read.  He stared at the page another five minutes before he closed the book.  He wiggled down under the covers and turned off his lamp.  He closed his eyes and tried to will the anxiety away.

Dean tried to sleep but Castiel was there on the other side of his bed and he wanted nothing more than to kiss him and cuddle.  Dean let out a breath slowly and tried calm his mind.  He wasn’t sure how long Castiel had been sleep but the light had been off for awhile.  A few minutes later Dean felt Castiel’s arm around him.  Dean stiffened and tried not to scoot back into the embrace.  Castiel pulled against him.  Castiel brushed his lips against Dean’s neck and sighed as he relaxed against Dean.  Dean moaned and closed his eyes.  He took a few steady breaths and found that he was sleepy and the sleep came easily.

<<<<>>>> 

Dean woke and stretched.  He blinked and realized it was morning.  He hadn’t had any nightmares.  Dean rolled over and Castiel was already out of bed.  Dean smiled as he brushed his hand over the pillow.  He sighed and got out of bed.  He got ready for the day and was downstairs when Jo let out a deep laugh.

“How come I have a feeling that you’re laughing at me,” Dean eyed them as he made a cup of coffee.

“We were just talkin’ about your snoring,” Jo giggled.

“Hey,” Dean slapped Castiel playfully.

“I was just advising her that I was able to get your snore into a pattern that may have resembled a song.  You snore along with my humming,” Castiel kissed Dean’s cheek and moved around him to get items to make his lunch.

“Whatever.  Are you gonna be home the same time as last night?  I have some studio time I need to put in but we need to finalize the engagement party list and all,” Dean asked as he put bread into the toaster.

“About the same if not earlier.”

“Should we expect you for dinner Jo?”

“Yup.  I’ve got classes only today so I’ll be here.  Cas gave me the spare key and alarm code so no worries about me breaking in here,” Jo winked.

“Good.  Because if you did I would let the cops hold you over night.”

“Very funny.”

“Eggs and bacon?” Castiel asked as he stared in the fridge.

“Sounds good.”

They had breakfast together then went their separate ways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading and leaving kudos and all the wonderful comments! You guys are so friggin awesome. There's sandwiches and pop for everyone. I hope no one is vegan. I don't have any vegan options. There's nice water and pineapple I guess.
> 
> Also if there is anyone that wants to be my beta I would love it! They always say never do final edits of your own stuff b/c you see how you want it not how it's supposed to be. And I wholeheartedly believe that since I think in pictures. We can swap. I can do yours and you can do mine. Or I'll do prompts for you. Whatever you want. I am born to barter.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> John's hateful attitude is in full effect. Bigotry warning.

Castiel woke slowly as a warm hand brushed his hip and moved under his shirt.  He sighed softly and scooted back into the person.  Warm breath caressed his neck as an almost silent moan tickled his ear.  Castiel wiggled his hips a little as he felt the firmness against him.

“Mm yeah,” Dean rutted against Castiel.

 _It’s just Dean._   Castiel thought as he drifted closer to sleep.

Castiel’s eyes flew open.  Dean.  Castiel froze. 

Dean pulled Castiel back closer to him as his hips pressed forward.  His hand rubbed Castiel’s stomach and he pressed his face into Castiel’s shoulder as he let out a soft sigh.  Dean’s fingers trailed down to the edge of Castiel’s pajamas.  They slid under and moved back to grip his hip.

Castiel gasped as Dean pressed firmly into him.  Dean continued to make soft sounds as he rutted against Castiel.  Castiel automatically pushed back into each shallow thrust.  He caught himself and tried to roll forward out of Dean’s grip.  Dean did not want any of that as his grip tightened.  Castiel whined and closed his eyes as his own erection sprung up.

“Dammit Dean,” Castiel mumbled.

“I’m know.  So good,” Dean murmured as he kissed Castiel’s shoulder, “gonna come so hard.”

“Oh no you’re not,” Castiel tried again to get away.

“Don’t tease.”

“Dean.”

“Mm.  Say m’name baby.”

“Come on Dean,” Castiel tugged at his hand and Dean bit him, “ow!”

Dean began to grind harder into Castiel and Castiel let a pleased moan slip before he caught himself.  Castiel took a deep breath and shoved his elbow back into Dean.

“Hey,” Dean groaned.

Castiel shoved him again.

“Dammit Cas stay on your side of the bed,” Dean rolled over with a grumble.

“I could say the same to you,” Castiel mumbled as he got out of bed.

Castiel looked down and he was still aroused.  The memory of Dean’s hands and hot breath on his neck made him twitch in his pants.  He groaned and headed to the bathroom.

 

Dean was dressed and in the kitchen when Castiel had finished getting ready.

“Morning,” Dean handed him a plate.

“Good morning.”

“Do you know how I got these bruises on my stomach?” Dean eyed him as he sat down.

“Could be because you were super clingy last night and I had to get you back on to your side of the bed,” Castiel gave him a slight smile.

“Oh.  Sorry,” Dean blushed and looked down at his plate.

“You also talk in your sleep,” Castiel hid his smile as he sipped his coffee.

“What?” Dean blushed deeper as he remembered the very NC-17 dream he had about his best friend last night.

“Yeah.  It was mostly mumbles but it was very cute.”

“Oh okay.”

“What are your plans today?”

“You sent me the emails that I need to look for the final party stuff so I’ll get on that and will probably just laze around the house.”

“I’m jealous.  I would like to laze around,” Castiel picked at his breakfast as the sound of Dean’s breathy moans assaulted his memory.

“The weekend is coming up.”

“Morning guys,” Jo popped in from the back door.

“Wow you’re up before us.”

“Shut up.  I had a thing.”

“What his name?”

“Her name was Nancy.”

“Ooh a her,” Dean raised his eyebrow.

“Yes Dean,” Jo rolled her eyes as she stole a piece of bacon off Castiel’s plate.

“Since when?”

“Since always.  I am not locked to one gender.  I date anyone I please.”

“Alright then.”

“Am I being judged by my gay brother?”

“Not gay,” Dean pointed his fork at her.

“Sorry.  Sex god brother.  You really shouldn’t judge.  Do I need to count the people you’ve had in your bed with and without a dick?”

“Alright new topic,” Dean made a face.

“Thought so.  I have to shower and get to class.  You two be good.”

“Aren’t we always?” Dean smiled innocently.

“Cas yes.  You not so much.”

Castiel laughed as he finished his breakfast.

“You weren’t supposed to laugh at her.”

“She’s right.  I am the more innocent one out of the two of us,” Castiel scrapped the extra food onto Dean’s plate, “I have to head out but I’ll be home for dinner.”

“Okay.  See ya later.”

<<<<>>>> 

Dean was worried as he got dressed for the engagement party.  He had told Castiel to keep it casual but he had out done himself as always.  Dean tied his tie and checked his reflection once more.  He let out a long sigh and left the room. 

As Dean headed down the stairs he thought about the days before when they had had to share a bed.  Each night had been nerve wracking but the best sleep Dean had had in weeks.  Dean got to the foot of the stairs and paused as he saw Castiel head in from the entertainment room.

“Wow,” Dean let slip before he caught himself.

“You look nice too,” Castiel grinned as he slipped on his shoes.

“That haircut and a little facial grooming did wonders for you.”

“I couldn’t let my fiancé out do me.  I knew you were going to wear the olive green button down because it makes your eyes bright so I just pulled on the royal blue,” Castiel grinned.

“Yeah.  It does do you good,” Dean’s eyes traveled along his body and returned to his face, “yeah.”

“Poking me in the mornings by accident was one thing young man.  Keep it in your pants,” Castiel grabbed his keys from the hook and they headed out.

Dean looked down and squeaked.  He cleared his throat and adjusted himself.

 

“Are we getting gifts?” Dean asked as they headed to Gabriel’s restaurant.

“Of course we are.  I had you approve the registry remember?”

“Oh that’s what that was for.  This is cool.  We’re getting gifts and I don’t even have to marry you for real,” Dean chuckled.

Castiel rolled his eyes.

They arrived early to make sure that the set up was to Castiel’s expectations and that they were able to greet everyone as they came in.  Gabriel talked animatedly as Castiel looked at all the place settings and flowers.  He nodded and headed to where the food was being set up.

“Castiel,” Gabriel put his arms around his shoulders, “I had my team follow your instructions to the T.  There is not a thing out of place.  I even made sure the music you provided was set up and did a run through.  It is going to be fine.”

“I know.  I just don’t want any issues popping up in the middle of everything.”

“It’s fine.  I promise.”

“Alright.”

“It’s almost time.  People are gonna start showing up.  Why don’t you grab Dean and get in place to greet everyone.  I have Sasha at the door to take gifts and there’s a table set aside out of view so that no one can see what you have until it’s time.”

“Thank you.”

Castiel and Dean stand by the entrance and shake hands and hug everyone as they come in.  Once everyone was seated they took their place at the head table sat faced to the others.

“Hello esteemed guests,” Gabriel stood in the middle of the floor and smiled at everyone, “we are here to celebrate the love of our two favorite people.  My brother Castiel and my best friend Dean.  It may have taken them over a decade to realize how in love they are but it finally happened.”

The room erupted with applause.

“First thing is first there are two murders among you,” everyone gasped, “you got it.  To make this evening fun our grooms to be have decided to play the ‘Murder Game’.  There is also a psychic among you.  This person can speak to any that have been killed.  You can get hints.  No gender based questions.  This is not guess who.  The murders have been picked and they have their weapons.  Now if each of you will lift you wine glass, if you have a blue circle you are the psychic,” he walked the room as he spoke.

“I’m goin’ to be telling the future,” Amara giggled as she jumped up.

“Ooh this is gonna be good,” Gabriel chuckled, “once you have been killed you’ll put on an arm band.  It takes two to accuse the killers so you may want to pair up with someone.  The killing has already started.  Just so you know it is not Dean or Castiel.  They are just here to enjoy it all.  We’re here to mingle and get to know each other.  After hors devours they will announce their wedding party.  Or at least that is the plan.  With these two who knows.  Drinks are by the tickets that you received and let us go on and give the happy couple another round of applause.”

The room was back filled with applause.

“Alright.  You guys have 45 minutes to mingle and get your first drinks.  Have fun.  And oh sorry Benny.  Looks like you were stabbed,” Gabriel rubbed his shoulder.

“What?” Benny pulled his shirt to see a red sticker, “damn.  I was stabbed with a triton.  At least it was a cool death.”

Everyone laughed and stood.  Dean and Castiel sat at their table and let everyone come to them.  After they had talked with everyone Gabriel motioned for them to get up and mingle as well.

“Did you pick the wedding party?” Dean mumbled as they headed to the bar that was set up in the corner.

“Yes Dean,” Castiel rolled his eyes, “you think that I would let you do the picking?  We’d end up with Buddy the puppy being ring bearer.”

“Okay good.”

“And what can I get you two sexy grooms?”

“Jack and ginger ale,” Dean leaned against the bar.

“Arnold Palmer.”

“Really?  It’s our party,” Dean pouted.

“It is but I am also driving.”

“Oh right.”

They headed back over to everyone and talked.  Dean looked around and realized that there were only two people from Castiel’s family.  He frowned and thought back to the list.  Dean remembered signing the invitations to his parents, aunts, and uncles.  Dean took Castiel’s hand into his as they talked to Mary and Ellen.  He gave it a squeeze and rubbed his thumb over the back of his hand.  Castiel squeezed back.

“Alright ladies and gents,” Gabriel had his headset microphones back in place, “it is time for the first course.  Please have a seat and we’ll get started.  Oh man Jo, looks like a nice death.”

“No way,” Jo lifted her arm, “fuck.  I died while motor boating Christina Hendricks.  I guess if I have to go out that is a lovely way to go.”

“Amen.  Enjoy your food.  There will be double for you Sam.  Don’t worry the kitchen staff knows you’re here,” Gabriel winked and turned his headset off.

“Did you pick the food?” Dean asked as the hors devours were placed in front of him.

“Of course.  Gabriel and I sat down and picked everything out.”

“Okay then I’m not scared to eat anything.”

“I guess,” Castiel smiled, “what was the hand for earlier?”

“Uh, nothin’,” Dean looked at his plate.

“Okay.  You’ll tell me when you’re ready.”

They ate in silence as they watched their family and friends bond.  Gabriel gave them time to enjoy the food and talk before he returned to the center of the room.

“Alright boys and girls,” Gabriel waited for everyone to turn, “it’s that time we’ve been waiting for.  The announcement of the wedding party.”

Cheers went up around the room.  Gabriel handed Dean a microphone and Dean passed it to Castiel.

“Hello everyone.  I’m glad that you all could make it.  I love seeing you here.  Dean and I have agreed to make this a very small event.  It isn’t something that we want to be overly produced.  Since we have come to that agreement,” Castiel pulled a card from his pocket, “our wedding party is going to be small.  Our best men are Gabriel and Sam.  I think we all already knew that.  Then we will have our groomsmen and groomsmaids,” there were scattered chuckles, “Jessica Moore, Sariel Anhel, Benjamin Lafitte, Joanna Harvelle, Amara Miranda, Kevin Tran and Garth Fitzgerald.  I will leave it up to you on who you would like to walk in with.  Dean and I flipped a coin so he will be standing at the front and I will be walked in by Mary Campbell-Washington.  There are envelopes with your names on them at the door for when you’re leaving that have all the information for your attire.  Our theme is being kept quiet until the last minute.  Thank you so much.  I look forward to our time working together to make this wedding amazing.”

“Great job little brother.  You’d think that you didn’t practice that a million and one times,” Gabriel winked.

“Uh what exactly is Dean doin’ if you’re planning everything and doing all the speaking?” Jess asked from her spot by Sam.

“I,” Dean grabbed the microphone from Gabriel, “am picking out the food and being pretty.”

“Oh okay then.”

Everyone laughed.

“So as the salad is being served we will have speeches.  Sam you can go ahead.  Now remember don’t out do what your best man speech is gonna be.  You don’t want me out shining ya,” Gabriel handed him the microphone from Dean.

“Thank you.  I just want to say a few things.  Not goin’ to take up too much time,” Sam faced Dean and Castiel for a moment then turned back to the crowd, “I’ve known Dean all my life of course and I feel the same about Cas.  These two are a pair made for each other.  Cas has always been there for Dean no matter what.  I’m sure we all remember that time Dean decided to bleach his hair.  He realized too late how bad an idea that was.  Cas helped him through it and was smart enough to dye it back without an ounce of panic.  Together they are remarkable.  I’m glad that I had a chance to grow with Cas and become part of his family.  We are here to get to know one another and I am glad to meet a lot of you that I have heard so many great stories about.  This union is goin’ to change our world.  I love you guys,” Sam turned and hugged each of them.

“Dammit Sammy,” Dean bit his lip.

“Alright,” Gabriel walked backed a little choked up, “damn my man is makin’ me weepy.  Next we have Sariel.  The oldest of the Anhel clan.  Do not make me cry big sister.”

“Hello everyone.  I love seeing so many new faces.  I’m glad you’re here to share this fantastic moment with us.  As some of you know I met Dean before he met Cassy.  I was a camp counselor and he was a little ruffian I tell ya,” Sariel smiled at Dean, “he was a little rough around the edges but deep down in him was compassion and caring.  These two guys are meant for one another.  It’s true when they say opposites attract.  Our wild child Winchester and our calm and collected Cas were destined for this.  Dean was the only friend Cas ever brought home and didn’t have to set expectations with.  Dean became a part of our family the moment he ate my mom’s meat loaf and didn’t complain even though it was terrible.  Or when Gabe set off a stink bomb in the house and he helped clean up the residue even though we had only known him a week.  Cas changed for the better when he met Dean.  Castiel would not be who he is today without him.  Let’s raise our glasses to this finally happening,” she lifted her glass and held it up for a moment then took a sip with the others.

“Dammit I told you not to make me cry,” Gabriel wiped his face and took a deep breath, “kiddos enjoy the next course.  Afterwards there will be more mingling and then gifts.”

The food was served and everyone was in the middle of eating when the door to the private room was flung open with a bang against the wall.  All heads turned as the man stumbled into the room followed by several staff members as they tried to pull him back.

“I see you.  You didn’t even bother to send me an invite,” John shook off the staff members and went straight to Castiel and Dean.

Dean jumped up and moved round the table, “what are you doing here?” he asked through clinched teeth.

“You gettin’ married to a queer and don’t even have the decency to invite your old man to the engagement party,” John laughed maliciously.

“You already let us know how you feel about us,” Dean stopped in front of John while Gabriel called his security.

“You damn fags think that you can do whatever you want.  You’re ruining your life boy,” John jabbed a finger in Dean’s chest.

“Do not touch my son,” Mary stormed over to them.

“Your son,” John spun around, “I raised these boys because you couldn’t take time out your busy schedule.  These are my boys.  It’s probably your doin’ that this one here is a faggot.”

“Shut up!”

Everyone turned to Amara.

“You don’t know me and I don’t know you but I know Dean and Cas.  They are some of the best people I have ever met.  You will not come in here and talk bad about them.  This is a beautiful thing.  If anyone is screwed up then it is you.  How could you treat your own son this way?  Obviously you’re nothing because you couldn’t keep a lovely woman like Mary.  Why don’t you get out of here?” Amara spat the words out as she moved closer to him.

“How dare you, you little bitch.  I can say and do as I please.  You’re all queer lovers.  These faggots and their brainwashing.  You’re all idiots.”

Everyone gasped and the room went still as John hit the floor hard.  Eyes stayed on him for a minute then everyone turned to Mary.  Mary scowled down at John as she shook her hand and flexed her fingers.

“I’ll be damned if you will talk about my kids that way John.  You will let these nice men escort you out and get a cab home.  This is why only Kate was invited.  She was too scared to show because she didn’t want to have to deal with you.  Now leave.”

The two security members lifted John and walked him out of the room.

“Mary has a mean left hook,” Kevin smiled.

“I’m sorry boys,” Mary turned to them.

“Bill get her some ice for her hand,” Gabriel directed a member of his staff.

“Mom you’re wonderful,” Dean hugged her as tears ran down his face.

“Thanks mom,” Castiel circled his arms around them.

They hugged those that came up then excused themselves to have a private moment.  Gabriel allowed them to use his office.

“Cas are you okay?” Dean touched his face gently.

“Yes.  I should be asking you,” Castiel leaned into the touch.

“I’m gonna be fine.  I grew up with it,” Dean shook his head and shrugged.

“Yes but you should not have to deal with it like this as an adult.”

“It is what it is.  I’m sorry your friends had to witness it.  My friends are used to it.  I’m also sorry that your family didn’t show,” Dean brushed his thumb along Castiel’s cheek.

“But didn’t they?” Castiel smiled.

“You big softy.”

They stared at each other for a moment and Dean leaned in.  Castiel’s lips parted and he closed his eyes.   Castiel felt Dean’s breath mix with his.  Then Castiel pulled back.

“Sorry,” Castiel stepped away, “I got caught up.  I should make sure that the dessert is in order,” he left the office without a look back.

Dean sighed and closed his eyes.  What did it mean?

Dean joined the room of friends and family again with a smile plastered on his face.  He walked around and checked on everyone to make sure that it had settled.  Gabriel had poured more wine for everyone to take the edge off.  Dean stopped at Amara and pulled her in for a hug.

“Thanks for that.”

“Not a problem.  I meant it all,” Amara hugged him and smiled.

“I know.  Cas can pick his friends well.”

“He had no choice.  I had to help with his cross stitch so he got stuck with me,” Amara chuckled.

“I’m glad we’re stuck with you.”

“Good.  Well I am going to try to make a move on the lovely guy over in the corner by the bar,” Amara smoothed a hand over her hair.

“That’s Jake.  He’s a TA with Sam.  He’s working on his PhD so go get ‘im girl.”

Amara adjusted her bra and put on a smirk as she moved over to Jake.  Dean laughed as she sauntered across the room.

“Hey big brother,” Sam slung an arm around Dean’s shoulders.

“You’re a little sloshed Sammy,” Dean chuckled.

“Yup,” Sam giggled, “sorry John came in bein’ a dick.  How do you think he’s gonna take it when he finds out Gabe, Jess and I are getting married?”

“Oh he’s going to lose his shit.”

“Good.  I love you and I don’t care that you’re marrying Cas.  You two belong together.”

“That’s what everyone keeps sayin’,” Dean laughed nervously, “Sammy, what if Cas and I don’t get married?”

“Wow.  You’re havin’ cold feet already.  Of course you and Cas are getting married.  You’ve had a crush on him since you first met.  It just took him some time to get it through his thick skull that he loved you too.”

“Yeah,” Dean at the floor.

“Looks likes Jess is beckoning me to dance.  I’m tipsy enough for that.  See ya later bro,” Sam walked over to Jess and pulled her in his arms.

Dean watched as people began to dance.  The love that showed in everyone’s face with their partners.  Even Amara had Jake on the floor.  Dean felt a pang in his chest.  His eyes roamed around the room until he spotted Castiel.  Dean watched as he laughed at something Gabriel said and it made Dean smile.  He loved to see Castiel happy.

“Alright everyone we’re going to go on and serve the dessert now.  It is Dean’s favorite so it is gonna be set up buffet style so you can get your choices.  Pie for everyone!” Gabriel announced a few minutes later.

“A pie bar,” Dean’s eyes went wide as he watched them wheel in the assortment of pies.

“Since at the wedding we’ll be having cake I thought it proper to let you have your pie tonight,” Castiel blushed as he stood by Dean.

“You are the best,” Dean turned and kissed Castiel without a thought.

“Oh,” Castiel blinked and stared at Dean for a moment.

“Sorry,” Dean whispered as blush blossomed over his face.

“Is Cas still nervous about PDA?” Bobby asked as he entered.

“Bobby,” Dean grinned.

“Now you know I’m not really here,” Bobby handed him a delicately wrapped box, “we’re not supposed to be involved but we like to show our support.  Looks like I came right in time.  That pie looks great.”

“Help yourself.  Thanks for this,” Dean took the box from him and handed it off to Castiel to hand off to Sasha.

“Thanks.”

“Robert Singer.”

“Uh oh,” Bobby turned slowly, “Ellen?”

“Look at you,” Ellen threw her arms around him, “how’ve you been?”

“Good. Very good.  What brings you here with these two overly adorable men?”

“They are like my sons.  They helped with Jo.”

“Oh.”

“What are you doin’ here old man?”

“Well uh,” Bobby looked around and Dean gave him a nod, “I’m on the team to help these two get a child.”

“Oh wow.  That’s fantastic.  I’ll keep your secret.  You just do your best to make sure you get my boys a baby.”

Castiel chuckled as Bobby and Ellen walked off.  Dean grabbed Castiel’s arm and tugged him over to the pie.  Castiel laughed and grabbed two plates because he knew that Dean would never be able to decide. 

With plates filled with pie they sat back at their table.  Dean made a joyful appreciative noise with every bite that he took. 

“Oh babe you have to try this one,” Dean lifted the fork to Castiel.

Castiel hesitated a moment before he took the bite.  Castiel eyes went wide and he hummed.

“Which one is that?”

“Raspberry something.”

“Jeez that was delightful,” Castiel reached across Dean with his fork and took more from his plate.

“Hey now,” Dean pouted playfully.

“Here try this apple crunch one,” Castiel lifted the fork to Dean’s lips.

“That was perfect,” Gabriel said as he snapped a picture.

“Hey no pictures,” Dean narrowed his eyes.

“I’ve been taking pictures all night.  I got some really good ones.  I have some of my staff also taking pictures.  The candid ones are the best.  You two are so in love,” Gabriel skipped off to take pictures of the rest of the party.

“They keep sayin’ that and I’m feelin’ a little guilty,” Dean whispered.

“Now you’re feeling guilty?  Dean I have felt this the entire time we put this together.  I had to make a fake wedding party for god’s sake.”

“I’m sorry,” Dean pulled him in and just sat that way with him for a minute.

“I know.  Finish your pie.  It’s almost time for presents.”

“Ooh,” Dean’s eyes lit up.

“You’re so spoiled.”

 The food was cleared and the presents were wheeled in next.  Gabriel assigned a staff member to write down who gave what so that Castiel could send out thank you cards.  Castiel sat to the side and allowed Dean to do the opening.  Some gifts were traditional then some were silly.  Overall it was a great turn out for them both.  Gabriel had everything packed away and put in the back of Castiel’s truck.

“Now before our final dance the grooms would like to say a few words.”

“Hey guys,” Dean grinned as he paced, “I want to thank you all for tonight.  We wouldn’t be here without your support.  I love you all and you have been fantastic tonight.  There were moments of excitement but you know we mostly had a wonderful night.  Thank you all for being so great,” he passed the microphone to Castiel.

“Dean covered it all.  I know this wasn’t as much of surprise as we thought it was.  It seems everyone has been planning our wedding since we met,” everyone laughed, “I have never loved another like I love Dean,” a soft aw went through the crowd, “he means the world to me and I’m glad that we can share this with you,” he looked over to Dean, “my life changed the moment you stepped into it and I am glad in the direction of which it is moving.  Our family and friends have joined our love and it will be nothing short of amazing when I walk up that aisle to you.”

Dean felt the sting in his eyes.

“Kiss!  Kiss!  Kiss!”

Dean’s eyes went wide and he ducked his head. 

Castiel squared his shoulders and turned fully to face Dean.  He took the steps to close the space and put his arm around Dean.  Castiel didn’t hesitate as he pulled Dean in and kissed him.  Castiel felt the pulse thrum in his ears and the warmth wash over him. 

Dean wrapped his arms around Castiel and deepened the kiss.  He moaned into Castiel’s mouth when he parted his lips.  Dean felt the weight lift from him.  He melted into the kiss that he had craved for too many years to count.  A real kiss.  Not a gentle peck but a breath taking kiss that he poured every ounce of his feelings into. 

When they finally pulled apart the room cheered.  Castiel blinked up at Dean.  His eyes searched his face.  Dean winked and let him go.

“Well that was some damn good PDA there,” Bobby laughed.

“Sorry.  Got caught up in the moment.”

“These two are out of control.  So do we have any guesses for our murders?  Most everyone at this point is dead,” Gabriel looked around the room.

“We do!” Jess waved as she grabbed Sam’s arm.

“And your guess is?”

“You!”

“Great guess but no.”

“Damn.  You were always so close when everyone got killed,” Sam frowned.

“I do appreciate that you would accuse your own boyfriend though.  Thanks guys.  So anyone else?”

“I do!” Jo raised her hand.

“And who is seconding your guess?”

“I am,” Kevin raised his hand.

“Then shoot.”

“Ellen and Mary,” Kevin and Jo said in unison.

“Correct!” Gabriel clapped, “there’s a gift bag for each of you on the way out.”

“Mom!” Sam’s jaw dropped.

“Yup,” Mary winked.

“You two are very good,” Jake laughed.

“They were the least expected.  That’s why we picked them,” Dean grinned.

“Alrighty peeps.  Let us dance and see the night off everyone.  Please remember to tip your bartender and staff.  They work hard because I am a slave driver.  Thanks everyone for coming and enjoy the rest of the night,” Gabriel took off his headset and went to Sam and Jess.

 

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: mentions of self harm

Dean giggled as they carried in the last of the presents.  He sat them in the living room with the others then fell back on the couch.  He kicked off his shoes and closed his eyes.

“I think you are pleased with your gifts,” Castiel stood above Dean and watched him.

“I am very pleased.”

“I’m going to shower and head to bed.  I’ll see you in the morning,” Castiel turned to the stairs.

“Cas wait,” Dean sat up on his elbows.

“Yes Dean?” Castiel looked over his shoulder.

“Eh,” Dean sighed, “never mind.”

“Okay then.”

Castiel headed up the stairs without another word.

Dean watched him go and let out a deep sigh.  He heard the shower turn on a few minutes later and thought about their kiss.  Dean groaned and flopped back down on the couch.

Castiel shook Dean.  Castiel tried to wake him but Dean was deep into his sleep with his legs hanging off the couch.  Castiel sighed and shook Dean harder.

“What?” Dean grumbled.

“You’re on the couch.  Get up and go to bed or you’ll hate yourself in the morning,” Castiel replied softly.

“Oh.  I must have dozed off,” Dean sat up and stretched.

“Yes about three hours ago.  I woke to get some water and you’re still here.”

“Right.  Okay getting up and goin’ to bed,” Dean stood and stretched again with a little grunt as his back cracked.

Dean began taking his clothes off as he headed up the stairs unaware that Castiel was only a few steps behind him.  Dean dropped his pants at the door to his room and kicked them off into his room as he tossed his shirt and tie in.

“Dean,” Castiel gasped behind him.

“Oh.  I thought you were getting water,” Dean turned in the doorway and caught Castiel’s eyes.

“What . . .?” Castiel eyed Dean’s thighs then looked up to his eyes.

“No,” Dean shook his head, “good night Cas,” he shut the door quickly.

Castiel thought back to all the times he had seen Dean undressed over the years and realized he had never seen all of him.  Dean wore knee length shorts and he always had on a tank top.  He had never seen him in just boxers.  Castiel couldn’t get the white lines of the scars out of his mind as he settled down into his bed.

<<<<>>>> 

_Dean placed the razor in the soap dish and closed his eyes.  He let the euphoria wash over him before the numbness settled in.  The white noise cleared as his eyes fluttered open and he looked down at his thigh.  Dean placed a finger in the blood as it ran slowly down his leg.  He smeared it over his thumb and watched as more ran down into the tub.  The water was pink from the blood of the cuts and Dean dipped the bloody fingers in to rinse then off.  He was alive and in control.  Each breath rattled free from him as the pressure eased up off his shoulders._

_“Boy are you almost done in there?  Sammy still needs a bath.”_

_“Yeah dad.  Almost.  Give me like ten more minutes,” Dean dropped his leg back into the water and winced for a moment._

_“You got five.”_

_Dean sighed and rinsed off.  He dried off and went to the medicine cabinet and groaned when he realized that John did not get more peroxide like he had asked.  He grabbed two alcohol swabs and cleaned the cuts.  Dean bandaged them to keep the blood from running down his leg as he went to his room.  He wrapped a towel around his waist and went to his room._

_Dean was under the covers when there was a light tap on his door.  It was their coded tap so after a moment Sam entered and sat on the foot of his bed.  Dean knew it meant that John was passed out drunk somewhere._

_“Dean you’re doin’ it again,” Sam stared at his hands as his shoulders slumped._

_“What are you talkin’ about Sammy?” Dean sat up in bed._

_“There was a drop of blood on the floor by the tub.  You’re hurting yourself,” Sam whispered._

_“Don’t worry about me Sammy,” Dean ruffled Sam’s damp hair._

_“I’ll tell mom.”_

_“No,” Dean grabbed his arm._

_“Dean,” Sam sobbed, “please don’t hurt yourself anymore.”_

_“Sammy.  I’m sorry.  Don’t worry about me.  I’m fine,” Dean pulled Sam into a hug, “you wanna sleep in here tonight?”_

_“Uh huh,” Sam nodded._

_“Okay,” Dean scooted over and let Sam in the bed._

Dean sat up and gasped for air.  He clutched his chest with wide eyes.  His bedroom door flew open and Castiel ran in.

“Dean!” Castiel stopped at the edge of the bed, “Dean, calm down.  Come on,” he took his hand, “focus on my voice.  Hear only me.  Come on Dean.  Take easy breaths.  Focus on me.  You are safe.  It is just you and me.  Calm.  Nice easy breaths.  That’s it.”

Dean blinked furiously as the room blurred and the hollow tunnel sound surrounded him.  He felt a warm hand clutch his.  There was a deep murmur that lulled him into peace.  He took a few deep steady breaths and Castiel’s voice came through clear.  Dean blinked slowly and turned to face Castiel.

“There you are,” Castiel smiled as he stroked his fingers.

“Cas,” Dean choked out.

“Shh,” Castiel squeezed his hand, “can I get you some water or do you want me to stay?”

“Stay,” Dean squeezed back.

“Is it okay if I get in bed with you?  It’s kind of early.”

“Y-yeah,” Dean rolled over out of the way.

“Thanks,” Castiel let go and pulled the covers back.

“Thank you,” Dean cleared his throat.

“No problem.  I’m right here.  I’m not going anywhere.”

“Okay.”

“Go back to sleep,” Castiel his arm over Dean’s hip and rubbed his back.

“Mm hm,” Dean closed his eyes and let Castiel’s scent settle him.

 

Castiel woke with Dean still in his arms.  He watched Dean sleep and ran his fingers through Dean’s hair.  Dean let out a soft sigh.  Castiel smiled at the gentle turn of Dean’s lips.  Dean pulled Castiel closer.  He let him and kissed his forehead.  The sun still had not risen and Castiel wished he had not skipped his sleep aid.  The pain settled behind his eyes and he knew sleep was not going to be something he would benefit him until that night when he was back in his room.  He watched Dean and wished that he woke every morning with the man in his arms.

_What are you thinking?  The kiss was just show.  So you guys work well together?  Who cares if everyone assumed you were already dating?  You cannot ruin your friendship for a fleeting romance.  But would it be fleeting?_

“Ugh,” Castiel closed his eyes as he twined his fingers in Dean’s hair, “Dean I love you.  I am head over heels in love with you and this fake fiancé thing is giving me mixed signals.  I feel like a blind man in air traffic control,” he mumbled.

“Love you too Cas,” Dean murmured against his shoulder.

“What?” Castiel pulled back and looked at Dean.

Dean was still fast asleep.  Castiel stared at him.  Dean grumbled and turned over freeing Castiel’s other arm.  Castiel stared at Dean’s back.  His mouth worked but no words fell from his lips.

_Was that real?  Am I thinking too hard?_

Castiel closed his eyes and took a deep breath.  He curled his arm around Dean and lay there with him until the sun began to peek from behind the curtains.  Castiel stretched and got out of the bed.

“Baby don’t go,” Dean rolled over.

Castiel stopped at the beautiful plea as he slowly turned back around.  Dean was still sleep as he kind of reached out.  Castiel let his head drop as an exhausted sigh escaped him.  He shook his head as he crawled back onto the bed.

“Fuck it,” Castiel rolled Dean on to his back and straddled him.

“Hmm,” Dean made a happy noise as Castiel’s weight settled on top of him.

Castiel pressed his lips to Dean’s.  Dean responded without hesitation.  Castiel tucked his arms under Dean’s as he leaned forward and kissed him with everything his heart had to offer.  Dean moaned as he parted his lips to taste Castiel.  Dean clung to Castiel.  Castiel shifted his hips as he felt Dean grow firm under him.

Dean dreamt that Castiel was in his bed willingly.  Castiel kissed him and he had no regrets.  Castiel gave into him and Dean let him have control.  Consciousness crept up on Dean as he felt a warm body on top of him.  Dean pressed his hips up and wrapped his arms around him. 

“Cas,” he gasped into the warm wet mouth.

“Yeah Dean?”

Dean’s eyes fluttered open and looked up at Castiel.  The warm sun light hit him just right.  Dean smiled slowly up at Castiel as he sat back so Dean could get a better look at him.  He looked like a work of art as the sun’s glow bathed him and made his eyes shine.  Dean’s eyes went wide once he realized he was awake and Castiel was really straddling over him.  He sat up and pushed Castiel.  Castiel yelped as his feet went over his head and he flipped off the bed.

“Ow!  What the hell was that for Winchester?” Castiel popped up with a pout and a softening erection.

“What the hell is goin’ on?” Dean pulled the blankets over his lap tighter.

“I was giving into my desires that I assumed you shared since you called out to me in your sleep,” Castiel crossed his arms.

“I, what?”

“Dean do you or do you not care about me?” Castiel to hide his hurt behind the anger of being tossed off the bed.

“I,” Dean looked away from him, “I don’t deserve you.”

“What?” Castiel dropped his arms.

“I’m broken Cas.  No matter what I feel for you,” Dean shook his head, “I don’t deserve someone like you.  I am meant to be alone.  I won’t get a kid and I will never have someone as fantastic as you to love me.”

“Dean,” Castiel climbed back on the bed, “to be crass, I would not have had such a wonderful boner while in your lap if I didn’t care for you.  You deserve the best.  I cannot promise I will be that but I will damn sure try.”

“Y-you’re serious?” Dean looked up at him.

Castiel shoved Dean back on the bed and threw his leg over him and kissed him hard.  Castiel didn’t let up until he needed to breathe.  He sat back panting with a smug look.

“Yeah.  I’m pretty damn serious.”

“Marry me Cas.”

“Might as well,” Castiel shrugged, “I’ve already done all the planning.”

“I’m gonna get you a better ring.”

“Why?” Castiel clutched his hand to his chest.

“That’s just something I made in the shop so you would have something to wear.”

“And that’s why I love it.  You made it for me.  I was going to keep it either way,” Castiel frowned at the thought of having to give it up.

“Oh,” Dean smiled, “okay then.  I’ll have to make you a really awesome wedding band then.”

“Yes you will because the one I bought you is amazing if I do say so myself,” Castiel grinned.

“What?” Dean easily flipped them and Castiel let out a squeak.

“Yup,” Castiel bit his lip, “I figured we may have to keep up the ruse for a while and wanted to make sure you had something nice to wear.”

“Hmm okay,” Dean kissed him then moved down to his neck.

“Dean,” Castiel gasped.

“You sound so good,” Dean nuzzled him and began to kiss across his collar bone.

“You’re, damn,” Castiel thrust against him, “you’re going to need to stop.  Or we’re having sex.”

“That doesn’t seem like a bad idea since it seems like I wasted a lot of time,” Dean chuckled against his shoulder.

“Mm no.  I want to wait until our wedding night.”

“What?” Dean pulled back and looked at him.

“Yes.”

“Th-that was just a ploy.”

“I think it would be very special if we did,” Castiel gave him a chaste kiss.

“Jo was right.  It would be your idea,” Dean sighed and rolled off of Castiel.

“Yup,” Castiel couldn’t help the grin that spread across his face.

Castiel caught sight of Dean’s legs.  He reached out before he thought and traced along the first mark he saw.  It was longest and darkest.  There were no hesitation marks.  Dean sucked in his breathe and flinched.

“When you’re ready I would like to know the story,” Castiel moved his hand to his hip.

“Mm hmm,” Dean closed his eyes as a tear trailed down his cheek.

“Honey,” Castiel wiped it away with his thumb.

Dean turned into the touch and kissed his palm.

“This is so easy.”

“Because we’ve been doin’ it all our lives and it was inevitable apparently,” Dean laughed, “we were the only ones that didn’t see it.”

“That’s weird isn’t it?  Everyone saw it but us.”

“We were just in such denial and too close.”

“We’re going to be parents,” Castiel brought Dean’s hand to his mouth and kissed his fingers.

“We might as well do it all at once right?”

“Yes.  I guess I need to move the rest of my stuff in here.”

“Yeah.”

“This isn’t a dream correct?  We have confessed our love for each other and we are really going to get married?  I’m not imaging this,” Castiel looked into Dean’s eyes as he searched for any amount of hesitation or regret.

“No Cas.  This is very real,” Dean kissed his nose.

“That explains it all.  Just remember to shut the door if you’re going BM please.”

“Jeez dude,” Dean wrinkled his nose and got up out of bed.

“I just want to set boundaries early,” Castiel chuckled.

“I hate you.  I’m gonna go make breakfast.  The shrink lady will be here in a few hours,” Dean shook his head as he pulled on pajama bottoms.

 

“Thank you for having me over,” Clarice smiled as she sat down in the chair in the living room.

“Thank you for coming out this way Dr. Abernathy,” Castiel sat a glass of lemonade down by her.

“Please call me Clarice.  I ask all my clients to.  I just have the PhD to get more money,” Clarice chuckled.

“Understandable when you work in field that is dominated by men.  Sometimes you have to have that edge,” Castiel gave a nod.

“I wasn’t going to say it,” Clarice gave a full belly laugh.

“But it’s true.  I will never know your struggles to the extreme but being an openly gay man comes with a few down falls.”

“I can only imagine.  You probably get it from both sides.”

“It has been wonderful since I got into the Garrison Firm.  They really are an EOE.”

“That’s very good.  So as you know we’ll be doing regular sessions throughout this process as well as when you have a child placed in your care.  I will do some sessions here and then we will have some that will be in my office.  I like to do my first in home because it makes it easier for all of us.  It is less tense and I was also informed about the wonderful spread that Castiel puts out,” she grinned as she eyed the plate that she had made for herself.

“I guess I’ll be going down in history as the one that cooks for all visits,” Castiel chuckled.

“I am glad.  I had to skip lunch because my last client ran a little longer.  I appreciate it,” Clarice flipped open her legal pad, “today we’ll talk about you two and I would like to get a little more about your family.  Missouri has sent me over the interview material that she had done with your family so I do have a little on them.”

“Great,” Dean smiled and leaned into Castiel as he took his seat next to him on the couch.

“You two just got engaged a few months ago but you have known each other since high school correct?”

“Yes,” Castiel took Dean’s hand into his, “Dean and I became fast friends.  I moved to town midway through sophomore year.  Dean was part of the welcome committee and it made me feel like I fit right in.  We were instant friends.  You couldn’t separate us.  We’ve been through a lot together,” he squeezed Dean’s hand.

“Yeah.  I fell for Cas right off.  I never told him until I just couldn’t take it anymore.  A decade plus went by before I could let him know that I was head over heels in love him,” Dean kissed his cheek.

“You too,” Clarice shook her head and jotted down on her pad, “what made you decide to adopt instead of going with a surrogate?”

“To be honest it means a lot to both of us to help a child in the system,” Dean’s face grew serious, “I want to bring joy and give a real life to an older child that has not had the best life.  I know that I can never replace their parent and I will never be able to change the past but I can give them a bright future.  Cas and I will provide the best home to a child and will excel at being parents that are there.”

“What do you think of discipline?”

Dean’s back went straight and his eyes darkened.

“C-could you clarify the question?” Castiel squeezed Dean’s hand and stroked his thumb over the back.

“If your child misbehaves how will you discipline?”

“It will depend on the behavior.  The punishment will always fit the crime.  I refrain from physical discipline.  I will never raise my hand to our child.  Never,” Dean looked to the floor then back up.

“What’s wrong Dean?” Clarice asked softly.

“My father,” Dean closed his eyes and took a deep breath, “John was big fan of corporal punishment.  I will _never_ fall back on that.”

“Understood.  You have the same beliefs Castiel?”

“Yes.”

“How about a change?  I am very interested in Sam, Jessica, and Gabriel.  They have a unique relationship.  How do you feel about that?”

“Uh why is this important?” Castiel narrowed his eyes.

“It speaks of family dynamics.”

“Gotcha,” Dean nodded, “They’re in love.  Love is not linear.  You cannot just pull out cookie cutters and think that everyone is going to fit into that shape.  Sometimes the square does fit through the circle.  They all met at the same time at some protest.  Something clicked between them.  Polyamory is not uncommon in all cultures.  They work and they love so thoroughly I was jealous for a while.  I wanted what they had.  Now I have it.  They date each other and they also date together.  They have it figured out.  Now that the laws have passed to allow a poly marriage they are going to tie the knot as well.  They are family.  Sam has never been happier and as long as they love and respect one another I don’t see a problem,” he shrugged.

“And you Castiel?”

“They work.  I have never seen my brother happier than when he is with them.  I saw Gabriel go through several horrible relationships.  With Sam and Jessica, they have such great communication and respect that they are the new relationship type.  They will be the mark of a new thing.  No one will ever look at them and think that they don’t know how to love.  They’ve been together for what,” Castiel turned to Dean, “eight years?”

“Yup.”

“I know marriages that have lasted less time.  I don’t question it.  It is not my place.  They deserve their happiness.  Who am I to judge?”

“Will you teach your child about love that way?”

“If they have questions we will answer them as best as we can.  We will not force our views and opinions on them.  They will be their own person.”

Clarice went on with a few other in depth questions and snacked from her plate.  They spent two hours together before she had to move on to her next house call.  They scheduled their next appoint in her office and saw her off.

“How was that more exhausting than Bobby, Tamara and Missouri?”

“It was more personal.  We were being evaluated,” Castiel rubbed Dean’s shoulders.

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” Castiel kissed his hair.

“It feels very good to be able to say that,” Dean sighed.

“It does.”

“Hey Cas,” Dean stood and turned to him.

“Yes Dean?”

“I love you,” Dean grinned.

Castiel threw a pillow at him.

<<<<>>>> 

Dean left the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist.  He whistled as he got dressed.  Dean looked over to the bed and smiled at the rumpled sheets.  He had not known Castiel was a cuddlier but he was pleased.  Dean sighed happily as he headed downstairs.  He stood and sniffed.

“Babe.  Are you burning something?” Dean headed to the kitchen, “the great Castiel Anhel is burning food.  Let us mark it on the calendar,” he chuckled as he walked in, “Cas?” he called when Castiel wasn’t at the stove.

Dean froze as he saw feet from around the edge of the counter.  Dean rushed over.  Castiel was faced down on the floor with the spatula at his fingertips.  Dean shut off the stove.

“Cas!” Dean fell to his knees and rolled Castiel onto his back.

Dean checked for a pulse first and when he found it he checked to make sure there was breathing.  He took a deep breath of relief and jumped up.  He yanked the phone off the charger.

“911 what’s your emergency?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What? Two chapters in a week. I know right. That's how I feel too. Oh and please don't hate me. Occasionally I like a little cliff hanger. Plus it made this chapter super long and the next chapter kind of short. Only one week for the next update. I do love you guys I swear. *tosses skittles out to everyone*


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas gets bad news but also good news.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I got really excited about this chapter and wrote it a lot quicker than I had originally planned. That also means that it was only skimmed and not really read through thoroughly.

Castiel groaned as consciousness returned.  The smell of disinfectant and linen were the first things that hit him.  Then he realized there was a tube in his mouth, another in his nose and to his utmost discomfort his penis.  He felt several patches on his chest and something was wrapped around his finger.  Castiel felt the stronger hand in his.  He tried to open his eyes but the lids felt too heavy.  Consciousness started to slip.  Castiel gave the hand a squeeze.

“Cas?” Dean croaked out.

Castiel hummed.

“Thank god.  You’re okay.  You’re gonna fall back to sleep.  They just put a sedative in your IV.  I’ll let them know you woke up,” Dean kissed his head.

Castiel gave a final squeeze as he dropped back into slumber.

 

Castiel woke without the oxygen and the feeding tube.  He blinked rapidly as he opened his eyes.  He looked down his body and saw the IV and O2 sensor still in place.  Castiel as he felt the tug of the catheter.  He winced and looked around the room.  Dean was asleep in the reclining chair with a blanket thrown over him.  Castiel tried to lift his head and everything began to spin and a sharp pain shot through his head.  He closed his eyes tight and lay back down.

Castiel took a deep breath and opened his eyes slowly.  He licked his lips and looked for a tray.  It was across the room with the water jug.  Castiel hit the call button on the bed rail.  A few minutes later a nurse entered the room.

“Good to see you’re awake,” she began to check his vitals.

“Water,” Castiel managed then cleared his throat.

“Sure,” she poured him a cup and handed it to him, “I’m going to take your blood pressure.  The cuff on your arm is going to squeeze.  You’ve been sleep for a while and I wasn’t sure if you realize it’s there.”

“Okay,” Castiel sipped carefully from the cup.

“He’s been here every day,” she nodded toward Dean.

“Every day?  How long have I been here?”

“A week and a half,” she watched the monitor and jotted the numbers down on his chart, “I’ll let the doctor know you’re awake and she’ll come explain everything to you.”

“Can I have some food as well?”

“Yup.  Dinner will be around.  We just pulled out the tubes when you woke this morning.  It’s going to be a restricted diet I can promise food but not flavor,” she smiled.

“Better than nothing I guess,” Castiel smiled back, “thank you.”

“Anything else you need?” she refilled his cup.

“Uh,” Castiel glanced to his groin.

“Sorry.  No can do.  You are not allowed to get up and walk yet.  Maybe in 24 hours.  If you have to go just go.”

“That sounds easier said than done.”

“It is but you’ll be fine.”

The nurse left and Castiel’s eyes settled on Dean.  As if he felt them Dean woke slowly.

“Cas,” Dean jumped up, “ooh too fast,” he wobbled and closed his eyes.

“I’m not going anywhere.  Take your time or we’ll have to trade places.”

“Baby,” Dean made it to the bed and kissed Castiel, “I am so glad you’re alive.  Now I have a chance to kill you.”

“What?” Castiel gave him a startled look.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were having migraines and trouble sleeping?” Dean frowned at him as he stroked his thumb over his cheek.

“I thought it was the stress.  I’ve had them off and on over the last few months.  They just got really bad when we started lying and I changed jobs,” Castiel shrugged, “is there something wrong?”

“Not anymore it isn’t,” Dean lifted Castiel’s hand to feel the bandages.

“Wh-what?” Castiel’s eyes went wide as he looked at Dean and the heart monitor went frantic.

“Calm down.  We’ll have to put the wedding off until you get your hair back.  I’m not marrying Lex Luthor,” Dean smiled.

“What happened?  Did I hit my head or something?  I remember making breakfast and then waking up here.”

“You may have ruined my favorite pan that morning.”

“You’re making a lot of jokes.  How serious?”

“Very serious,” Dean kissed him, “if you hadn’t passed out we may not be having this conversation baby.  I would be giving your eulogy.”

“Fuck.”

“Yeah.  Anything.  I don’t care if you have a splinter or a paper cut you better fuckin’ let me know.  I am damn serious Cas,” Dean sobbed, “I can’t live without you.”

Castiel pulled him into his arms.  They stayed that way until the doctor came in.  Dean stepped aside but held Castiel’s hand.

“Good to see you awake Mr. Anhel.  I’m Dr. Mills.  Dr. Cunningham your PCP is on missionary work.  It’s a good thing you fainted.  If you hadn’t we wouldn’t have been able to catch the tumor,” Dr. Kills looked over his chart.

“Tumor?” Castiel looked up at Dean with wide eyes.

“Yup.  I’m gonna leave all the big words out because it ain’t gonna make a lick of difference when I tell ya.  There was tumor and it was giving you headaches and pressing on the part of the brain that controls fatigue.  I’m assuming you weren’t sleeping with the traces of Rozerem that was in your system.  The great news is that it hadn’t spread too far.  The operation was successful and it was removed completely.  We did have to, in Lameman’s terms, zap parts of your brain so it wouldn’t be too much damage.  You may have trouble with balance for a few weeks.  However, you will be able to sleep and reach REM stages again.  You will start to feel overly awake for the next month or so while your body recuperates.  I’m keeping you for a couple more days.  We can get you out of this room and into another more festive room.   Being in the ICU is never fun.  We may have broken a few rules here for your hubby to be as well but that’s our secret,” Dr. Mills winked.

“Thank you doctor.”

“Don’t thank me yet.  We’re going to have to do a MRI and CT scan later.  That will get a little uncomfortable.  I’ll let you two go back to being damn adorable.  If you need me they can page me from the nurse’s station,” she put his chart down and left the room.

“See,” Dean kissed his fingers.

“I’m sorry.  I went to Dr. Cunningham and he didn’t think anything of it.  I didn’t think anything of it.  Next time I’ll be more careful and let you know.”

“You’re damn right you will.  I just let you know I love you.  I ain’t givin’ you up yet,” Dean kissed him.

“I can’t believe this.  I’ve missed so much work.”

“Really?  Only you.  Don’t worry Sammy let them know.  They have you on leave for two months.”

“Good.”

“I’ve got some good news,” Dean beamed.

“What?”

“We got approved.”

“For what?”

Dean rolled his eyes, “we’re gonna be foster parents.”

“What?  We did!  Dean,” Castiel pulled Dean into his arms, “ow!  I have to remember not to move around so much.”

“Catheters are awful.”

“We got approved.  We’re going to be parents,” Castiel smiled, “I’m going to be a dad.”

“Yes you are.”

“Or should I be papa or daddy or pa?  You can be dad.  It was your dream first.”

“We’ll let them decide.  I don’t care what they call me.  They can call me Dean as far as I care.  We’re going to have a child.”

Castiel looked at Dean and was glad that he was able to share it all with him.

“Here comes your dinner,” the food aid smiled, “bland with a side of bland and a touch of bland.  But there is a jello cup,” he put the food on the wheeled tray and brought it over to Castiel.

“Thanks for being honest,” Castiel laughed.

“Yeah well I am not one to lie.  It is mostly a liquid diet because you can’t really travel to the potty if you get my drift.”

“I forgot to tell you about this cool guy.  This is Ephraim.  He volunteers here every day.  He’s been keeping me well fed when Sam and Gabe can’t drop by.”

“And I didn’t bring you anything since your beloved was awake.  I didn’t think it fair for him to see your deliciousness while he eats liquid air and cardboard.  Sally is holding a lunch in the cafeteria for you though,” Ephraim winked, “I’ll see you two for dinner tomorrow.”

“Bye Eph,” Dean smiled.

“You seem to have made friends,” Castiel pulled the lid off his tray.

“Yeah.  Dr. Mills wasn’t jokin’ when she said they broke rules.  We got extended visiting hours, I slept over and so much more,” Dean pulled up the other chair.

“I’m glad they took care of you.”

“Go slow,” Dean watched as Castiel took the top off the soup.

“I’m starving but I also don’t want to get sick,” Castiel took a tentative sip from the bowl, “oh god this is horrible.  He wasn’t joking about the bland.  I guess I can’t have salt since they only put pepper up here.”

“I’m sorry honey.  As soon as you can have real food I will make you the best food.”

“You better.  Sorry about your pan.”

“Forget the pan.  I’m glad you’re okay.”

“I’m also bald,” Castiel sat the soup down and picked up the jello cup.

“We can get you a really awesome wig or cute hats.  Just think winter will be here before you know it.”

“Hey Dean.”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“I love you too,” Dean grinned.

<<<<>>>> 

“I feel like a senior citizen,” Castiel grumbled as he moved up the front walkway with his walker.

“It’s this or I carry you.  I will not allow you to fall again,” Dean walked behind him with his bag slung over his shoulder.

“I’d rather look old than like a princess.”

“You _are_ my princess,” Dean stepped around him and unlocked the door.

“That’s derogatory.  I’m way more of a queen,” Castiel smiled, “did you build a ramp for me?”

“Maybe,” Dean smiled as he helped Castiel into the house.

“You’re a good man.”

“I am because you made me that way.”

“You’re also a sap.  Crap how am I supposed to get to our room?” Castiel stared at the stairs.

“You won’t have to.  Follow me,” Dean put Castiel’s bag on the stairs.

“Dean you didn’t,” Castiel shuffled behind him to the study.

“Just temporarily.”

Castiel shook his head as he saw a new sofa with a bed pulled out and made for him.  A new table had been added with a television and there was a mini fridge in the corner.

“The only thing that you have to really leave for is the bathroom and that is right across the hall.  I thought this was better for you than having to worry about the stairs.  You get all the books you need at your fingertips, you can watch whatever you want, and we’ll keep snacks and drinks here for you.”

“Thank you so much.  Can I take a nap now?”

“Sure thing.  There are clean pajamas there for you.”

“Thanks,” Castiel leaned across the walker and kissed him.

 Dean left Castiel to change and went to the kitchen.  He looked back to make sure that the door was closed before he picked up the phone.

“Yeah we just got back?” Dean in front the fridge as he tried to think of something to cook for dinner.

“How’s he doing?” Sam asked.

“He’s okay.  He feels a little useless but he doesn’t seem blue.  Thank Jess for the beany that she made for him.”

“Did you explain to him that it was better to shave all the hair instead of just the one section?”

“Yeah,” Dean pulled chicken from the freezer, “he understood but you know how much he loved that unruly mop.  He’s already got peach fuzz so I think another few weeks he’ll be happier with it.”

“Good.  Mom has excused the two of you from dinner over the next two weeks.  Then after that she expects that you will both be there every week.”

“How can I get out those?”

“You can’t,” Sam laughed.

“I think I can think of a way but I think as of now it doesn’t matter,” Dean sat down at the counter to make a grocery list.

“What would get you out family dinners?”

“If I told her about a really big lie.  But that entire situation is now moot.”

“What lie?” Sam’s voice held a curious edge with a hint of suspicion.

“Nothin’.  Forget I said anything.  Just a lot on my mind.  When is Gabe’s grand opening?”

“A month.”

“Great.”

“You’ll be throwing a baby shower before then probably.”

“We’re getting a kid not a baby.”

“Same thing.”

“Does Gabe need any help?”

“Nah.  He’s got it all under control.”

“Alright.”

“Jess told me to ask if you’re still on for the siege tonight.”

“Hell yeah we are.  We work hard to get this fuckin’ far.  Time to lay waste,” Dean grinned.

“You two and your video games.”

“You wouldn’t understand.  She’s brains and awesome.  You’re brains.  I’m so glad you’re marrying someone who is fun or else you wouldn’t have any fun.  Man, yeah without Gabe and Jess you’d be a big o’ snooze fest.”

“On that note I’m going back to work.  I’m taking over some of Cas’ stuff so he doesn’t get behind.”

“Thanks for that.”

“No problem.  If you two need anything let me know.”

“Will do.  Later.”

“Later.”

Dean sat the phone on the counter and looked at the list he had made.  The cabinets were bare since he had not spent more than a few hours there while Castiel had been in the hospital.  He had spent the previous day cleaning up and getting the downstairs in shape.  Dean groaned as he headed upstairs.  He looked in his room and frowned.  He had tossed everything everywhere.  He emptied a basked and gathered the laundry.

Dean was on round two of laundry when Castiel woke and headed into the living room.  He sat by Dean and leaned onto his shoulder.

“I’m hungry.”

“Lasagna will be done shortly.  I made it with ground chicken for you,” Dean put his arm around him.

“You weren’t joking when you said you’d cook me real food.”

“It’s also all I could cook.  I need to make a serious grocery run.  Everything was bad.  It took trips to get that stuff out.  If I had thought about it I would have done it all before I picked you up.”

“I’m glad you didn’t.  I have stuff I want to get.”

“Okay.”

“Dean.”

“Yeah?”

“We’re going to be parents.”

“Yes we are.”

“I am both terrified and excited.  I thought that I was going to be uncle Cas for so long that being daddy Cas scares me.  What if I suck as a dad?” Castiel tilted back to look up at Dean.

“What if you don’t?”

“Well I had every intention of spoiling your kid rotten.  I am now required to be a disciplinarian as well.  I don’t know if I can handle it.  This is a 24 hour gig.  I can’t walk away from it.”

“I know.  You don’t have to stay here.  You can get a little place for yourself.  This was not part of the plan.  _I_ want to be a parent.  It doesn’t mean you have to be a parent.  I have already thought this over.  I’ve been looking forward for this day for quite a time.  I don’t expect you to jump right in and take this easy,” Dean kissed his forehead.

“But I’m really excited about this.”

“Whatever you want to do.  I’m not forcing you into anything.  I’ll always be your guy whether you stick around or not,” Dean shrugged.

“Really?  Now I’m a dead beat dad to a kid that got chosen for us,” Castiel chuckled, “that image is hilarious.”

“I just want you to know you have options.”

“Understood.  I think I will get a separate therapist to talk with as well.  Just in case stuff comes up.  This is new for me.”

“Cool.  You know what really sucks about all this?”

“What?”

“I can’t get people excited about you and me hooking up.  I want to get the excitement all over again now.  At first it was weird and awkward but now I want it.  I need the first time of everyone knowing about to happen again now that it’s real,” Dean pouted.

“Well if my parents show up then you can tell them.”

“They’re no good.  They haven’t shown excitement in like 20 years.  It really sucks because I want to tell everyone but they know.  This just isn’t fair.”

“I’ll invent a time machine while I’m off and we’ll go back in time.”

“Promise?” Dean kissed him again.

“Promise.”


	10. Chapter 10

“Dean,” Castiel whined as Dean slowly stroked him.

“Yes love,” Dean pressed against his back.

“Please,” Castiel sighed.

“You said no sex until we’re married,” Dean kissed his shoulder as he increased his hand’s pace, “I suggested a hand job since it doesn’t have the word sex in it.  Though I still argue if we call it fellatio there is no sex in it.”

Castiel grunted as he pushed back against Dean.  He felt Dean’s erection pressed firmly against him.  He squirmed more as Dean’s hand slowed again.

“I will kill you,” Castiel groaned.

“I love you too,” Dean chuckled and nipped Castiel’s ear.

“Please,” Castiel bucked hard in his hand.

“You want me to make you come baby?” Dean gave a hard thrust as he whispered in his ear.

“Yes.  I need this.  Been too long,” Castiel squeezed his eyes shut and whined as Dean slowed his hand again.

“Okay lover,” Dean kissed his shoulder and began to tug at a decent speed with a twist.

“Th-thank you,” Castiel shivered as the pleasure began to ebb and flow steadily.

“That’s it.  Come on Cas.  I thought you wanted this,” Dean teased as he began to thrust at the same pace.

“Close Dean,” Castiel whimpered as his hips lost their rhythm.

“Yeah baby.  Give it to me.  I need this too.  Our first shared orgasm.  Come on,” Dean moaned as Castiel pushed back against him.

“Yeah.  Dean,” Castiel whimpered as he fell over the edge into climax.

“Fuck yes,” Dean hips shuttered against Castiel as he rutted against him, “right behind you.”

Dean grunted as he came in his boxers.

They lay there on the bed and relaxed into each other.

“Mm, that was nice,” Castiel murmured sleepily.

“Hell yeah it was,” Dean wiped his hand on the sheet and pulled Castiel to face him, “wanna give up that vow now?  Let’s do this for real.”

“No,” Castiel kissed him and smiled, “we’re _going_ to wait.”

“At least let me suck you off.”

“Dean,” Castiel looked scandalized for a moment.

“Really?  We’re grown ass men.  I can talk sex without you blushing right?”

“Not like that.  That is just so raunchy,” Castiel scrunched his nose.

“What?  I can’t tell you how much I want to lick your cock.  Or should I not talk about how I’ve been practicing deep throating bananas to make sure I can take all of you?  Maybe it’s the idea of me kissing your balls before I take your rock hard, dripping, throbbing cock into my mouth.  You eat so well I bet you taste divine.  I shoulda given you a taste before I wiped off my hand.  I guess I’ll have to wait ‘til our wedding night,” Dean stroked his fingers lightly up and down Castiel’s side as he spoke.

“Jeez Dean,” Castiel shivered as his words affected him.

“That’s what I thought.  Just let me do it.  You don’t have to.  I enjoy doing these things to you.  Let me make you happy.  Once we have a kid here this isn’t gonna be nearly as easy.”

“That’s true.  But the answer is still no Dean.  I want to wait,” Castiel kissed him.

“Okay,” Dean returned the kiss.

 

Dean and Castiel went down to Angelic Pairings and met with Missouri in her office.

“Hi fellas,” Missouri smiled as they took a seat in front her desk.

“Good afternoon.”

“Hey ya Missouri,” Dean grinned.

“I brought you something,” Castiel handed her the container, “peanut butter fudge and milk chocolate fudge.”

“Thank you.  You are going to spoil me,” Missouri grinned as she slipped the container in her upper desk drawer.

“You’re welcome.”

“Well gentleman I have some very exciting news,” she pulled out a folder and opened it, “I have a placement opportunity for you.”

“But it’s only been a month.”

“I know.  I am very excited that this has come up for you two.  I do have a question for you though.”

“Definitely ask away,” Dean began to tap his foot.

“I don’t know how you will be feeling about this.  The placement that popped up and I called you.  Then a few days later I got a notification that there was a sibling.”

“Two.  We could get two of them,” Dean turned to Castiel with wide eyes, “baby.”

Castiel’s jaw dropped then he caught himself and reeled the emotion a bit.  He turned to Dean and grabbed his hands.  They stared at each other for a few moments then turned to Missouri.

“Yes,” they replied at the same time.

“Wow,” Missouri looked on astonished as she had expected the worst response because she had seen it before, “I . . . I am at a loss for words.  I never imagined that I would get a yes.”

“Oh.  I should say no?” Dean’s brown creased.

“No!  It’s just that most people and prospective foster parents would turn this down.  An unexpected extra child.  It would be a burden.  It would mean more money.”

“Missouri, I think that we have gotten to know each other very well over the last several months.  I would never split up a family.  I am financially set.  I am not worried about the money.  I have more than enough love to share with an extra child,” Dean smiled softly as he willed the tears to stay at bay.

“Alright then,” Missouri opened the folder, “this is Shane and Dakota Lexington.  They are twins and are thirteen years old.  They got separated about three years ago.  Dakota was placed in a home with others and was stable.  Shane was placed across the country somehow.  The foster home got busted for misuse of their money they get and then there were issues with drugs.  Shane is clean and on his way here.  He has had his evaluations and has been cleared.  He will need to be watched and receive his counselling like normal.  This would constitute as a special needs foster situation.  We are working with the state on this one which means you will receive assistance from the state as well.  Dakota is very quiet.  She is at the top of her class.  The home that she is in cannot take Shane.  That is why I am looking to place them together if possible.  I will give you their information and let you look over it for a few days.  We have a temporary home for Shane since he cannot go with Dakota yet.  Let me know.”

“Yes.  They are worth it.”

“You haven’t looked over the details.  Their records and information may change it for you,” Missouri bit back her smile.

“I understand that this is unique and more than I originally wanted.  I am also aware that these two need to be together.  You can’t separate family,” Dean nodded as he tapped his foot a little faster.

Castiel rubbed his neck and nodded along with Dean, “he’s correct.  We’re going to do this one way or another.  We should set up a time to meet them.  Just because we say yes doesn’t mean they will.  They may not want to be in a house with two dads.”

“That is a reason I chose them for you,” Missouri smiled, “we’ve already talked to them.  They are interested.  I am not sure which one but it has come to our attention that they need someone that is comfortable with different sexual orientations.”

“Oh,” Castiel smiled, “then we should set a date up.”

“I have scheduled a meet and greet next Wednesday if you would like we can do it some place public.”

“No.  We’ll have it at our house.  Give them a chance to see where they have a chance to live.  That will give us time to set up a second room.”

“That will leave me with one extra room.  My house will be full,” Dean couldn’t help the grin that spread.

“Alright.  Thank you guys for coming down.  I will email the details and we’ll get the paperwork drawn up for you.”

Dean stood, “can I hug you?” his voice cracked.

“Of course.”

Missouri walked around the desk and pulled Dean into her arms.  Castiel hugged her as well then they headed out.

“Two!  We’re going to have two.  I have to go shopping.  We’ll set it up just as neutral.  I’ll store a few extra things.  I need to make sure the bathroom is set up with feminine care products.  Thirteen is a good age.”

“Thirteen _is_ a good age.”

“Cas,” Dean glanced over to him as they drove, “are you sure about this?”

“Dean when it comes to your happiness I am in it 100 percent.  I am extremely excited about this.  They are old enough to take care of themselves but still readily influenced.  We can change their lives,” Castiel took Dean’s hand and gave it a squeeze.

“Thank you.  I have no idea how you’re doin’ this.  I mean, we went from being fake engaged to really engaged to being parents in days of each other really.  This is amazing but I feel like it has been too easy.  You haven’t fought me on any of this.”

“I know.  I have given everything thought.  I have been in love with you for years.  Wanting to spend the rest of my life with you is an easy thing to choose.  Having a family with you is the next step and I would never turn it down.  We’ve lived together for a few months and it has been wonderful.  Adding to it will only increase how fantastic it all is.  I will have concerns later as will all relationships and we will take care of it then.  I will speak with my therapist as well.  We are prepared for this Dean.”

“Alright then.  Where do you want to stop first?” Dean rubbed his thumb across his fingers then put his hand back on the steering wheel.

“Let’s go to that place where Jess got the stuff for Sherry.  She got her a lot of nice things.  I think the walls are a fine colour so I don’t feel we’ll need to paint.  We’ll need to get a few things that are feminine and some that are masculine and let them decide how they would like to finish the decorations.  Some cute throw pillows, fixtures for the lamps, area rugs and maybe a few pictures or wall ornaments.  I think greens, purples and yellows would a good start.  Then they can finish it up,” Castiel pulled out his phone and made a list.

“You’re gonna be a great dad.”

“Shut up before you make me cry.”

“Alright.  Dad.”

“I’m warning you. Dad,” Castiel chuckled.

“I like the sound of that.  You think they’ll call me dad?”

“I don’t know.  They’re teenagers so they might not at first.  If they are ours for long term they may switch,” Castiel shrugged.

“I kind of want them to.”

“I know.  I would like that too.”

“Oh god.  What type of foods will they want?”

“I think anything that you cook will be fine,” Castiel made a note to check with Gabriel on food options.

“I’m over thinking this aren’t I?”

“It’s expected.  Don’t worry about.  I don’t love you any less.”

“Okay then.”

Castiel smiled over to Dean and let the joy wash over him.  They were going to be parents.

<<<<>>>> 

Dean rushed through each room and checked over them again and again.  Castiel had made sure he had smoked that morning but his nerves still were on end.  Castiel stayed in the kitchen with the food prep as Dean ran through the house cleaning and triple checking everything.  The doorbell rang and Dean squealed before he ran down the back stairs.

“I should’ve dressed better,” Dean looked down at his tee shirt and jeans.

“Go get the door.  You look fine.”

Dean nodded as he moved to the front of the house.  He took a deep breath and opened the door.  His breath caught.  The tingles ran up his arms and he felt the twitch of his toes as he was met with the sight of Shane and Dakota.  Dakota’s dark curly hair was tied back in a ponytail and she was dressed in the exact clothes Dean wore.  Her mouth dropped open.  Shane laughed.  His own curly hair fell loose to his shoulders.  He was dressed in jeans, tee shirt and a vest left open under a jacket.  Missouri smiled and led the kids into the house pass Dean.

“Hi guys,” Dean smiled and shut the door behind them.

“Hi Mr. Winchester,” they said together.

“Creepy twin thing.  I like it,” Dean grinned, “and please call me Dean.  Mr. Winchester is a cranky old man that is my father.”

“You’re not just wearing that shirt because it’s cool are you?” Dakota eyed Dean suspiciously.

“No,” Dean laughed, “I got this when I went to see Trent and the guys at a little club called Twisters that used to exist probably before you were born.  It’s an authentic vintage.”

“Wow,” Dakota’s eyes lit up, “I got this at a garage sale.  Also authentic,” she lifted her chin proudly.

“Awesome,” Dean held his hand up for a high five.

Dakota slapped it without missing a beat.

“I heard there was going to be food,” Shane looked around shyly.

“Shane,” Missouri chuckled, “sorry.  I may have talked about the food a bit.”

“Oh you are so right Shane.  Cas is in the kitchen getting everything together.  Do you mind if we take a quick tour before we head in there?”

“Hm,” Shane bit his lip, “I guess that’s okay.”

“Great.  Where do you want to start?”

“Can we see where our room will be if you pick up?” Dakota asked.

“Sure.  Let’s go upstairs. And I won’t be picking you guys.  You’ll have to pick me,” Dean winked with a smirk.

“Oh.  Okay,” Dakota smiled.

“I wasn’t sure how close you two would like to be to each other so the rooms are across the hall from each other.  You can pick which ever one you would like.  We have some extra stuff to decorate with so you can put your personal touch in each room,” Dean walked pass his room and led to the two rooms at the back.

“W-we get separate rooms?” Dakota and Shane replied.

“Yeah.  You guys are young adults.  You deserve your own personal space.”

“Wow.”

Missouri had stayed downstairs with Castiel to give Dean a chance to be with the children and see how they reacted without her around.  Dean wished she had stayed with him as he watched them go into the first room.

“Look how big the bed is,” Shane gasped.

“Look at the closet space.  There’s toys too.  Oh god look there’s a radio and CDs.  This is awesome.  I really like the green walls,” Dakota touched everything as she moved around the room.

They stayed in there a few minutes before they went to the other room.

“Ooh!  This one is mine.  It has a great view of the trees,” Shane pushed the blinds to the side and peered out.

“That’s cool because I like the other one better.  This one is way more you.  The walls are a light colour.  I know you like that.”

“You guys want to see more of the house or you want to spend time up here?” Dean walked in.

“Where’s the TV?” Shane asked as they followed him out.

“I think you’ll like the next room a lot if that’s your question,” Dean laughed, “ before we go down,” he pushed the door open, “you guys will share this bathroom.  It will be all yours.  Cas and I have one in my bedroom which was the first door when you come off the stairs.”

“Cool.”

“It’ll be nice not to have to share with five other people,” Dakota commented as they went down.

“You had to share before?”

“Yeah.  It was crazy.  They’re really nice.  It’s just a really full house.”

“Understandable,” Dean stopped outside the doors, “are you two ready for this?”

“Yes!”

“Alright,” Dean pushed the doors open, “enter the entertainment palace.”

“Holy crap,” Shane went straight to the TV, “this is a thing of beauty.”

“Look at all the movies and games,” Dakota looked over the titles.

“Kota look at the giant pillows,” Shane jumped onto the stack of pillows, “can I move in now?”

“I wish I could say yes,” Dean laughed, “we have a few other things before that decision.”

“Well I am giving you an A+,” Shane grinned as he walked over to his sister, “that is a ton of games.  A lot of our favorites.”

“Dean I’m ready for you guys,” Castiel called from the kitchen.

“Well it’s time for the food now.  You guys ready to meet my soon to be husband?”

“Yes.  I can’t wait to have two dads,” Shane pulled Dakota away from the cabinets.

Dean pointed out a few things as they walked through the living room and the dining room to the kitchen.

“This kitchen is gorgeous and huge,” Shane nodded his approval.

“Hello Dakota and Shane,” Castiel smiled brightly.

“Hi Cas-ta-el,” Shane sounded out slowly.

“It’s Castiel,” Dakota whispered.

“Oh.  Oops.  Sorry.”

“Call me Cas.”

“Thanks Cas.”

“I have put a few things together.  As you can see I love to cook.  I also like to teach.  So I have made a few things but not necessarily enough.  I figured you guys might like to try cooking a few things later.”

“That would so rock.  I love to cook too,” Shane smiled.

“He does.  Before we,” Dakota looked to the floor then back up, “got separated he cooked all the time.  He could barely reach the stove but it didn’t stop him.”

“I used to sit on her shoulders to reach cabinets,” Shane put an arm around Dakota.

“Well that’s good then.  You and I can rule this kitchen if you choose to come here.  You guys can dig in.”

Shane and Dakota washed up then made plates.  They sat down at the table with Dean and Castiel as Missouri observed them quietly.  She took a few notes as she finished her plate of food Castiel had made for her.

 

* * *

 

[Layout of the house](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/designsmakethefic). You can follow my tags STC or Spiraling Touched Calamity on that blog for anything else I may add.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you may have noticed this is not the final chapter as I had intended. Somehow my short little closing chapter ended up over 10k+ words. So I split up. It makes it easier to post and gives me time to edit smaller chunks since I am still beta-less right now. I hope you liked meeting the kids. They'll be back! 
> 
> As always you guys are fucking fantastic! I love you guys so damn much you have no idea. Thank you for the kudos, comments, and reading! I am always happy to share my time with you. Drop me a line or prompt. I'm always open starlightoffandoms on tumblr.


	11. Chapter 11

They cleaned up the kitchen after they had made a mess with cooking.  Shane and Castiel talked about recipes while Dean showed Dakota the grill and the rest of the backyard. Missouri smiled and continued to take her notes silently. 

“Dean,” Dakota looked up at him as he pushed her on the swing.

“Yeah?”

“It’s not a problem that our dad was black is it?”

“What?” Dean stopped the swing, walked around and knelt in front of her, “Dakota what makes you ask that?”

“I have been at the same home for almost a year.  They thought that I was of Spanish decent.  They called Mrs. Moseley when they found out my dad was black.  They don’t want me in their house,” Dakota all but whispered, “I would like to be placed here with you and Cas if it works out.  I just want you to know I’m half black up front so if you don’t want us we won’t get attached.”

“Oh my god,” Dean pulled her into his arms as tears welled, “Dakota I don’t care if you’re part Martian.  I want you here if you want to be here.”

“Thanks.”

“Oh crap,” Dean let her go, “I’m not supposed to hug or anything without supervision.  I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable.”

“It’s okay,” Dakota wiped her eyes, “I’m glad you don’t care about my dad.”

“I’m sorry that you thought you had to worry.  Are you still at that house right now?” Dean walked her back to the house.

“No.  Mrs. Moseley found us a temporary home.  Bobby Singer is a really good man.  His wife Karen is a delight.”

“The Singers are good people.  I’m glad you have somewhere more comfortable to stay.  We have a long road ahead of us but I’m feeling confident,” Dean opened the door for her.

“It’s usually about a month.  We have to have a few supervised visits then a couple unsupervised and an overnight.  Then they’ll question you and us.  I think we’re going to be fine,” Dakota smiled up at Dean.

“I think you’re right kiddo.”

“Hey there.  I was about come and get you.  We have to be heading out but Cas has already got us scheduled for the next visit,” Missouri smiled as she put her things in her bag.

“Oh so soon?” Dakota frowned.

“Soon as in four hours later my dear,” Missouri chuckled, “you’ll see them in a couple of days.  There’s gonna be a barbeque at Sam’s house.  You’ll like it.”

“Okay.”

They pulled on their jackets.

“Thanks for having us,” Shane smiled and shook their hands.

“Can I give you a hug?” Dakota asked.

“Definitely,” Dean leaned down and pulled her into his arms.

“Thanks for earlier again.”

“No problem.”

“Cas,” she threw her arms around him, “thanks for feeding that monster of a little brother of mine.”

“You’re welcome.”

“Four minutes!  That’s it.  You’re older by four minutes,” Shane threw his hands in the air.

“And don’t you forget it,” Dakota grinned as they headed out the door.

“Glad to see things are very much real around here these days.  See you boys Saturday,” Missouri winked and pulled the door closed behind them.

Dean followed Castiel to the living room and they cuddled on the couch.

“Do you think Missouri knew?”

“Of course she did,” Castiel laughed, “she’s known since the beginning.  I was a mess that first day Dean.  She just knew true love when she saw it.”

“Really?  Cas you think so?”

“Yes.  She asked me questions that were very probing and more about us when we did the interview after you lied.  I assumed you knew that she knew,” he ran his fingers through Dean’s hair while he leaned on him.

“Dakota asked if we wouldn’t want her because she’s mixed.”

“What?” Castiel stilled his fingers.

“Yeah.  How horrible is that?  Like why would you even tell a kid that?  And secondly how would that even matter?  I hope that everything goes well.  I know there’s a ton more paperwork and I don’t care.  I would rather my hand fall off from filling out paperwork than those kids having to have a bad home.  Right now they’re stayin’ with Bobby.  Dakota seems to like it there.”

“Bobby with teenagers must be wonderful.”

“I’m glad that we’re getting them.  I am too attached to not get them already.  Shane simply loves you.  He looked at you like you hung the moon when you gave him that cupcake recipe.”

“You and Dakota will probably talk music all day and night for the first week,” Castiel resumed his petting of Dean.

“Yeah.  This was good.  I’m happy.  Hey Cas.”

“Yes Dean?”

“Tell the wedding party not to worry about their clothes and tear up the save the dates.”

“Dean,” Castiel’s hand froze.

“We’re gonna elope.”

“Oh.  Okay.”

“I don’t need a big to do made.  I love you and you’re mine for eternity.  I just need the paper just in case.”

“I’m very much okay with all of this.”

“Good.”

<<<<>>>> 

“I’ll be back here at six to get the kids,” Missouri gave a nod and left.

“Shane and Dakota we’re going to go to my brother Sam’s house.  I’m sure Missouri gave you little heads up about what this means but I like to make sure you understand.  Sam is engaged to Castiel’s brother Gabriel and a wonderful woman named Jessica.  They are polyamorous.”

“Right.  Sam loves both Gabriel and Jessica.  They are going to be one of the first couples married under the new law.  We get it.  It isn’t so weird.  A lot of cultures have poly couples.  I’ve very intrigued by their dynamic,” Shane nodded as they got into the impala.

“Well okay then,” Dean glanced at Castiel.

“You’re very smart,” Castiel smiled.

“Thank you.”

“Do we call them aunt and uncle?” Dakota asked as she buckled in.

“Not if you don’t want to.  Things aren’t really finalized so I don’t have any expectations.  You say what you feel is comfortable,” Dean replied as he backed out the driveway.

“Okay.”

 

They pulled up at Sam’s and the kids’ mouths dropped.  They hadn’t warned them about Gabriel’s desire for the large house.  They had bought it together and wanted to fill all the rooms eventually.  It was smaller than a mansion but still a beautiful stone piece of elegance.

“This place is beast,” Shane stated in awe as they walked around to the gate for the backyard.

“It is beautiful.  You guys know how to pick houses.”

“Hey guys!” Sam called from the grill and waved.

“Hey.”

Everyone turned and greeted them.  Dean made the introductions and they settled around the yard.

“Uncle Sam can I see your library before we leave?” Shane asked shyly.

Sam’s eyes went wide.  He looked from Shane to Dean and back.

“Uh sure.  Definitely.  You can even pick out a few things to take with you.”

“Cool,” Shane ran off to play with the other kids.

“Did you tell him to call me that?” Sam whispered.

“Nope,” Dean smiled.

“That felt great,” Sam giggled.

“I know.”

“That’s how I felt when Sherry got old enough to talk.  Being an aunt is awesome,” Jess grinned and gave Sam a hug.

“Thanks for bringing your niece and nephew Jess. I didn’t want them to be the only kids.”

“Kim was glad to have the day alone with Brent.  Sherry and Will need more friends.  Do you know which school they’ll be going to?”

“I have an interview at Braxton Academy next week.”

“Braxton?” Sam’s eyes went wide.

“Right now they both have a 3.6 GPA.  It won’t be hard to get them in there.  I think it would be good for them and they are friends already with a few of the kids there.  Bobby has had a few of them over.”

“You are such a great dad and you don’t even have them yet,” Jess hugged Dean.

“I want only the best.  I like that it’s a private school with only a shirt dress code.  There’s no ties or plaid skirts to worry about.  They can still express themselves.  They’ll get a better education and be able to stay at the same school since it goes through high school.”

“Dean has been working very hard for our kids,” Castiel smiled as he took a seat by them.

“Your kids?” Mary grinned.

“Oh.  I didn’t mean to say it like that.”

“But it’s true,” Dean kissed Castiel.

“Did you guys do something?” Mary eyed them, “you seem, I dunno, closer or something.  Did Dean finally talk you into that couples weekend before you go back to work?”

“No.  I’m still not doing that,” Castiel laughed, “we’ve just had a lot more time to be together with me at home.”

“Okay,” Mary nodded but her eyes still watched them suspiciously.

“Who the hell are you?  Whose little half caste brats are these?”

The entire backyard went silent as John entered.  The music played in the background but no one spoke for a moment.

“Kids come on lets go inside,” Jess got the kids together and ushered them into the house.

Dean followed when he saw the tears in Dakota’s eyes.  She was too smart for her own good.

“I don’t see no mullato parents around here,” John stumbled in the yard.

Castiel stood without a word.  His lips balled in a tight frown as he stalked over to John.  John opened his mouth to talk but Castiel didn’t give him a chance.  When John hit the ground he followed and grabbed him by his shirt.  Castiel lifted and slammed him into the ground several times before he began to punch him.  He heard the voices of the others and felt hands grab him but he struggled to continue to strike John.  Castiel wasn’t sure what words left his mouth but he knew they were filled with heat and hate as he rained down a few more punches before Mark and Sam dragged him off of John.  Castiel kicked at John and continued to scream at him as he heard sirens.

“Calm down brother,” Gabriel knelt in front of him as Sam held him in the seat, “looks like he got you once,” he dabbed away the blood on his brow.

“It’s over.  I just can’t anymore,” Kate let Mary pull her away, “I can’t.  I tried for Adam but I can’t.”

“It’s okay.  Come on.  We’ll let the cops handle him.  You can bring Adam over and stay with Mark and me.”

“Dad?  What the hell?” Adam followed after Mary with containers of food for the cookout.

Castiel seethed as Gabriel talked him down.  He closed his eyes and let the anger fall away.  He didn’t want the kids to see that side of him.  No one should see that side of him.  It had been years since he remembered that side of him.  Castiel took a few deep breaths and let Gabriel wrap ice packs around his hands.  He listened to everything through fogged ears as the police entered the yard. 

No one stood to defend John.  They took him in cuffs for assault and drunk in public charges.  The police questioned Castiel and everyone’s story lined up with self-defense.  Castiel gave his statement and the police left.  Castiel stood and went into the house to check on Dean and the kids.  Sherry and Will left when Castiel sat down.

“Hey guys,” Castiel whispered as he sat down in the den with them.

“You shouldn’t adopt us.  It’s just gonna be like that all the time.  We’re not worth it,” Shane gave a defeated sigh.

“You look here,” Dean put a hand on Shane’s knee, “you’re worth everything.  That was unfortunately my father.  He doesn’t like me much either.  I’ve been called a few names too since he found out Cas and I are getting married.  I’m sorry that you had to deal with that.  People should never say anything like that to anyone let alone children.  You’re gonna be part of my family.  I don’t care what anyone frigging says.  As you can see neither does Cas.  We will figuratively and literally fight for you.”

“Please know that violence is not the answer.  I just kind of lost my temper back there.  I hope you didn’t see that,” Castiel looked down out of shame, “that isn’t who I am.  I hope I didn’t scare you.”

“It’s not like it isn’t something we’ve seen before,” Shane held Dakota’s hand, “we’ve been in the system since we were seven when our parents died.  We’ve seen more than enough.  I’m sorry that we’re not the kids you want.”

“You two are the kids we want.  I mean, who wouldn’t want you two?  You’re damn adorable and it’s two for the price of one.  I get a boy and a girl.  I couldn’t turn you down even if I wanted to,” Dean smiled.

“Really?” they looked at Dean and Castiel.

“Yes really,” Castiel smiled and nodded.

“This is only our second visit.  How can you be so sure?”

“I was sure the minute I saw your file.  You’re supposed to be ours.  I don’t care what I have to do you’re going to be mine.”

“Okay,” Dakota smiled and gave Shane’s hand a squeeze.

“Good.  Now let’s go eat.  I can smell the food from here.”

Dean took their hands since Castiel’s were still wrapped.  They went back outside and everyone acted like nothing had happened.  There may have been a few extra hugs and lingering glances to make sure they were okay but nothing too obvious.

“Kate and Adam are staying with us until she can get a place,” Mary relayed to Castiel as they carried out more drinks for everyone.

“If she isn’t looking to move too far my old place is still up for rent.  Apparently the company had been subleasing it so the actual lease isn’t up yet.  She can lock it in at the rent control rate.  Once the lease is up then it will jump in cost.  If she gets in there now she can keep the rent control price until she moves out.  It comes furnished,” Castiel offered.

“I think that would be perfect.  It would mean that her move will be so much easier.  Thank you.  I’ll let her know.”

“No problem.  I’ll call them in the morning and let them know.  They had just called me wondering if I wanted to release it.  Is she going to need help moving?”

“Yeah.  John will probably be out in a few days so if we could get it done tomorrow it would be perfect.”

“I’ll make sure that Dean and I are free,” Castiel sat the tray down on the table.

“Has Dean talked you out of going back to work yet?” Mary asked as they returned to the kitchen for ice.

“What?”

“Oh.  He hasn’t said anything.  Oops.”

“He doesn’t want me to work?” Castiel followed after Mary.

“He thinks you should get a work from home gig.  With the scare he wants to make sure you take it easy.  He thinks you work too hard.”

“Is this just him?” Castiel eyed her.

“Maybe a few of us have talked about it.”

“I like my work.”

“But you could do a lot of it from home honey,” Mary filled the cooler with ice and handed it to Castiel.

“I just took over Sam’s job.  They moved him so I would come in.”

“And they could move him right back.  Just think on it dear.”

“Mommy Mary you are too much sometimes,” Castiel shook his head as they headed back out.

“I know.”

Castiel put the ice down and watched as Dakota and Dean tossed the football back and forth.  His eyes scanned the yard and found Shane and Sherry huddled around Will and his PSP.  It dawned on Castiel that his future was in front of him.  As soon as the placement was finalized his weekend would look like that under nice weather until they were too grown to hang out with them.  Castiel felt something he had never felt before and it made him blissful.

<<<<>>>> 

Dean popped the popcorn as Dakota and Shane picked out a movie.  It was their first overnight stay and it had been perfect.  They would go back to Bobby’s Sunday night for school on Monday but they had all of Friday night through Sunday afternoon at their house.  Castiel had run out to the super market for breakfast supplies.  Dakota had already decorated her room and Shane had left a few things over the last visit they had.  Dean couldn’t help the grin that spread when he thought about it.

“You would think they were calling for snow instead of a hurricane warning the way the store was packed,” Castiel entered with a huff.

“Was it that bad?”

“Yes.  If people prepared early then they wouldn’t be going through this.  I did stop to make sure we had gas for the generator just in case.”

“You’re so cute when you’re grumpy.”

“I know.”

“And modest,” Dean chuckled.

“I’ve got enough so we’ll be good for this entire weekend.  Shane and I are going to have a ball,” Castiel began to put everything away.

“You are so ready to be a dad,” Dean kissed his cheek as he pulled the popcorn from the microwave, “you two decide on a movie yet?”

“Harry Potter!”

“Alright.  Not a bad choice at all.  What do you want to drink?” Dean dumped the second bag of popcorn in the bowl.

“Whatever!”

“I’ll get drinks and you take the popcorn,” Castiel opened the fridge and pulled out a couple bottles of pop and a beer for Dean.

They settled into the entertainment room and started movie.  They made it through the first two before it was time for dinner.

“I have plain cheese pizzas and lots of toppings you can add.  Once they’re down we’ll settle in and watch the next movie.  We’ll have to finish the series tomorrow though.  It’s too long to try and finish them all tonight,” Dean pulled the personal pizzas out of the fridge.

“We can eat in there?”

“Wouldn’t be any fun if you couldn’t,” Dean replied as he pulled out Ziplocs of already diced toppings, “I know how much you like cheese so there is also extra cheese to go on top.”

“You rock Dean.”

“I try.”

 

Dean felt the hand on his shoulder but he didn’t want to open his eyes.

“Dean, love wake up.  I need help with the kids.”

“Hmm?”

“They’re sleep.  Let’s get them to their rooms.”

Dean grumbled as he woke and stretched.  He blinked slowly and looked around.  Shane was sleep across two of the giant pillows and Dakota was curled up on the loveseat.

“Oh.  Okay.”

Dean took Dakota in his arms while Castiel picked up Shane.  They already changed into their pajamas while the pizza had cooked so they just tucked them into bed.  They stood at Dakota’s door then moved to Shane’s.  Castiel took Dean’s hand and pulled him to their room.

“I think I’m going to cry,” Castiel hugged Dean to him, “this was too perfect.  I picked them up from school, helped with their homework and I just tucked them into bed.  I need them Dean.  I didn’t know how much until now.  They can’t take them away.  I need them forever.”

“Baby,” Dean kissed his neck as they hugged, “me too.  I need this.  I felt so complete tonight.  Nothing else mattered but my family.  We have to keep them.  There is no other way.”

“You promise?” Castiel pulled back and looked at him.

“Yeah.  I don’t care what we have to do but I’m not giving them up.”

“Good,” Castiel kissed Dean softly.

Castiel’s eyes lingered on Dean’s as they held each other.  Dean pulled him closer and kissed him again.

“Cas,” Dean whispered between kisses.

“Dean,” Castiel tugged at Dean’s hair, “make love to me.”

“I thought-”

“I need to feel your love more than ever right now my beloved.”

Dean checked to make sure the door was locked before he moved back to Castiel.  Dean swept him in to his arms and kissed him hard.  Castiel moaned into the kisses and his hands began to fumble with his clothes.

They had undressed quickly.  Castiel pulled Dean down on top of him.  They kissed and groped each other until Castiel whined for more.  Dean chuckled as he opened the nightstand drawer.  He rummaged through and found the lubricant. He watched Castiel as he teased his rim with a slicked up finger.  Castiel whimpered and pushed down.  Dean smiled and eased the finger inside of Castiel. 

Dean kissed down Castiel’s chest as he worked him open.  When he added a second finger he took Castiel’s length into his mouth.  Dean worked him over with his mouth as he added a third finger after a while.

Castiel didn’t know where to put his hands as Dean sucked and licked him.  He found himself with his fingers twisted in the sheets then in Dean’s hair then just everywhere.  Castiel thrust into Dean’s mouth as Dean’s fingers worked deeper into him.  He began to mumble incoherently as Dean took him all the way down.

“Dean,” Castiel managed in between ragged breaths.

“Yeah baby?”

“Please.”

“You sure?  I can still wait.”

“Winchester if you don’t get in me I will hold your down and do it myself.”

“Ooh kinky,” Dean kissed his stomach then sat back, “you look so good.”

Dean slicked himself up and lifted Castiel’s legs.  He knew for their first time they should do it the traditional way but he wanted to see Castiel’s face.  He knew that Castiel had had enough partners to know better as well.

“Don’t over think it,” Castiel murmured and hooked his leg around Dean.

“You’re beautiful,” Dean kissed him as he positioned himself.

Dean guided himself in to Castiel then rested his hands on either side of Castiel’s shoulders.  Dean sucked in a breath as he pushed forward.  He heard Castiel moan as he put his hands on his hips. Dean peppered Castiel’s face and lips with kisses as they found their rhythm.

It had been a while for Castiel since he had had a partner and he was glad that he had waited for Dean.  It had been everything he had imagined.  Dean was not the rush into and get it over with type of lover.  Dean took his time with Castiel.  Castiel sighed in pleasure as Dean began to suck and bit his neck.  Castiel wove his fingers through Dean’s hair as his hips jerked up when Dean hit his prostate.

“More.  Again,” Castiel whimpered.

“So good,” Dean grunted as he clutched Castiel to him, “I can’t hold off.”

“Mm hmm,” Castiel nodded as he began to move faster.

Dean lost his rhythm and his hips stuttered and jerked as he felt his orgasm yank him forward.  He pressed a kiss firmly to Castiel’s lips as he climaxed.  The friction of their stomachs brought Castiel a few minutes later.  Dean jerked a few more times inside of Castiel before he pulled out and collapsed on Castiel.

“Oh crap,” Dean sat up a few minutes later.

“What?” Castiel mumbled.

“We didn’t use a condom.”

“I’m clean Dean and I saw you paperwork from a few months ago.  You haven’t been with anyone else.  We’re fine.  You know unless I get pregnant,” Castiel teased.

“You better not get pregnant,” Dean smirked as he waddled to the bathroom.

“I dunno a third would be nice.”

“You’re taking diaper changing duty.”

“I’m fine with that.”

Dean giggled as he returned with a warm wash cloth and cleaned Castiel up.  He got back in bed and they cuddled under the covers together.

“Are you sorry we didn’t wait until our wedding night?” Dean kissed Castiel’s forehead.

“Nope.  This was perfect,” Castiel pulled Dean closer and closed his eyes.

“It was wasn’t it?”

“Love you, dork.”

“Love you too nerd.”

<<<<>>>> 

Castiel walked quietly down the stairs as he heard Dean and the kids in the kitchen.

“But how long is this going to take?  I’m hungry.”

“Well hungry I’m Dean.  It’s so nice to finally meet you.”

“Ugh,” Dakota rolled her eyes but still smiled.

“That’s not even the worse.  You should have heard him before you got up,” Shane laughed.

“Really?”

“Go on Dean.”

Dean turned to Dakota, “did you hear about the kidnapping at school?”

“What?  No.”

“It’s okay.  He woke up,” Dean grinned.

“How does Cas live with this?” Dakota laughed.

“What’s the best thing about elevator jokes?”

“What?” Dakota grinned.

“They work on so many levels.”

“That one is my favorite,” Shane laughed from his place by the stove making pancakes.

“What did the hungry clock do?” Dean asked as he scrambled the eggs.

“I dunno what did it do?”

“It went back four seconds.”

“Where do you even come up with these?”

“What did the chicken say about the scrambled egg?  There goes my crazy mixed up kid.”

“Alright,” Castiel walked in and laughed, “let me stop this before it gets anymore lame.”

“How do you put up with this one?” Dakota smiled.

“Small intervals.”

“I see.”

“I thought I was going to make breakfast,” Castiel said as he pulled out the juice.

“You did yesterday so we thought we’d let you sleep,” Dean leaned into a kiss.

“You two are adorable,” Dakota replied as she got up to set the table.

“We try.”

“So we have our interviews Tuesday and I think that will be it for us.  Are you guys as excited as I am?” Dean scooped eggs onto each plate.

“Yes.  My friends Tia and Amber can’t wait for me to get to Braxton.  Plus we’ve made a few friends in the neighborhood.  We’re going to be perfect here,” Dakota grinned.

“Good.  I can’t wait.  So we have half a day today.  Did you want to watch more Harry Potter or do something else?”

“Can we play games?”

“Sure.”

“I need to get the books back to Uncle Sam too.  I brought the one’s I finished with me,” Shane stated as he put the last of the pancakes on a plate.

“I can take them over or did you want to visit him today?” Dean asked as he carried plates to the table.

“Can we go over?  I’d like to play with their new puppy.”

“Sure.”

“Um are we going to the grand opening of Uncle Gabe’s new place?” Dakota asked as she pour syrup on her pancakes.

“Yeah.  I’ve already got it approved by Missouri and Bobby.”

“Great,” Dakota perked up.

They fell into an easy conversation over breakfast.  Dean watched as they talked with Castiel about the school project he promised to help them with.  He smiled as he looked at his family.  He knew that he had just one more step to complete their family permanently and he couldn’t wait. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All dad jokes are from baddadjokes on twitter.
> 
> I originally had no intentions of including the kids. I was going to just end it with them getting approved. Then I got excited about seeing them interact some with the kids. I hope that it turned out as well as i think. There's just one more chapter. For real this time. It will be up within a week.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Closing loose ends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Mentions of self-harm.

Dean and Castiel sat in the living room wrapped in a blanket.  They had done their interviews and had another weekend overnight with the kids but had not heard anything yet about permanent placement.  They sat together in the quiet as they let their thoughts consume them.  Dean glanced over at Castiel as his eyes shifted over objects in the room.  Dean took a deep breath.

“I used to cut myself,” Dean closed his eyes and let out one of the only secrets Castiel did not know.

Castiel stiffened beside him.  Castiel shifted to be able to look Dean in the eyes.

“John used to,” Dean swallowed audibly, “he used to beat me as you know.  I wouldn’t let him hurt Sammy.  I couldn’t, so I took it.  When he caught me with a boy he beat me really bad.  I felt like I couldn’t control anything.  We only saw mom every other weekend back then.  I was grounded for months after he had caught me.  I needed to feel something.  They started small. Then,” he took a deep breath and let it out slow, “I cut deeper and bigger.  One night it was too deep.  Sam came home and had to call an ambulance.  We never told anyone what really happen.  They think it was an accident while trying to cut vegetables.  They never mentioned the other scars.  I cut myself a lot back then.  Then my mom finally got custody of us.  Sam still watched me a lot and would never leave me alone until we lived with mom.  Sam was my guardian.”

“Dean,” Castiel wrapped his arms around him.

“That isn’t it.  I knew that Sam would inspect my body so I moved on to just using ties to tie off my air way until I passed out.  It was a good high and I was in control of it.  I’ve never told anyone that outside of my shrink.  I was screwed up Cas.  If you’re gonna marry me I think you need to know all of this.  I am so fucked up.  I understand if you don’t want me,” Dean pressed his face into Castiel’s neck as tears ran down his face.

“Dean I am not going anywhere.  I am in this until the end.  We are a unit and you are my beloved.  I know that your past is not the brightest but I also know that I love you and all your flaws.  I am so glad you feel comfortable with me to share this.”

“Castiel,” Dean sobbed and held onto Castiel.

“Shh.”

“John is such an asshole.  He messed us up.  How can you love me?  How are we together?”

“Because I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.  I have loved you for too long to just look away from this, ever.  Plus look at our brothers.  They are also happily in love.  John may have screwed you up but Mary made you whole.  She fixed you.  The later teenage years are what made you the person you are today.  So you have a few quirks and you smoke weed to deal with the stress, which is okay.  You’re no longer cutting or asphyxiating yourself.  You are beyond those things.  You are a good man.  You are a man that many of us love.”

“Why?” Dean’s voice shook.

“Why not?”

Castiel held Dean and let him cry on his shoulder.

“You have to go John’s hearing in a few days,” Dean wiped his face.

“Yeah.  I won’t go if you don’t want me to.”

“No.  You have to go.  He’ll never be held accountable for what he did to us but he should be held accountable for something.  He spent a week in jail and now hopefully he’ll get more time or at least community service.”

“It’ll never be enough,” Castiel kissed his hair.

“I’m just glad that Kate and Adam got out.  Adam won’t say anything to us but I think that there were a few times that he got the heavy hand.  He is seeing a counselor so I’m happy about that.  I just don’t want anyone to go through what we did.”

“I know love.  We got Kate all moved out before John was released so he is really alone.  I don’t think anyone will go to him.  He was on the news and everything.  He’ll either get help or die alone.  He won’t hurt anyone else that we love.”

“I know,” Dean leaned in and gave Castiel a chaste kiss, “thank you.”

“For what?”

“Being you.”

“No problem.  That’s the easy part.  Want to smoke some?”

“Yeah.”

“I rolled some yesterday or I can get the bong.”

“Bong is too much work.”

“Okay,” Castiel kissed Dean before he stood, “we should move everything into the bedroom.  I don’t want the kids accidently finding it.”

“Ooh.  What if they want to smoke one day?” Dean watched Castiel go to the hall closet.

“Then we tell them once they are 18 we can discuss it.  We will not allow them to smoke while they are so young.”

“Okay.  That sounds reasonable.”

“Are we also going to discuss when I go back to work?” Castiel placed the tackle box on the table.

“Mom told you?” Dean leaned forward and lit the incense.

“Yes,” Castiel smiled.

“I have talked with the school and they agree that you can do a lot of your work from home.  They have someone that can take Sam’s place in the criminal justice department and he can move back to anthropology.”

“I see.  So you went behind my back and talked with my superiors?”

“Possibly,” Dean looked away sheepishly.

“Of course with your charm you probably could have gotten a lot more out of them.  I have talked with both the firm and school.  I’ll be working from home and have to report to the school or office twice a month.  While the kids are in school and you are at work I will be doing my work.  I have already started to update the study to be more comfortable for me.  I will be reorganizing it.  I have also called the contractor to look at adding on a room to the back.  I would like a private office that isn’t mixed with my family life,” Castiel smirked as he lit up.

“You little sneak.  Well how about we turn the back garage into your office?  I can move all of that stuff into the storage on the other side.  That way it’s disconnected completely and you get privacy just in case you get a big project.”

“Where will you park baby when it snows?” Castiel passed to Dean.

“I can put a tarp over her.”

“If you say so.”

“I do,” Dean grinned then took a drag and passed back to Castiel.

“Don’t forget that we’re picking up the kids tonight and going to Gabriel’s.”

“I still cannot believe that he named his second place after him.  Though it is totally designed after him.  I can’t believe he had clowns for the grand opening,” Dean chuckled.

“Yeah.  Poor Sam.  I thought he was going to have a heart attack.  Gabe should have known better.”

“It was worth it.  I got a lot of good pictures of him freaked out.”

“You’re a horrible brother,” Castiel teased.

“Yeah but you love me all the same.”

“Because I know no other way to live,” Castiel grinned and passed back to Dean.

“Sap.”

<<<<>>>> 

Castiel ran his hand down his face as he left the courthouse.  He let Gabriel, Sam and Jess escort him out and to their car.  They had driven together to have comfort in numbers.  He hadn’t expected testifying to be so hard.  They had not been warned that others had come forward about John’s abusive behavior.  Apparently there were numerous bar fights and parking lot brawls that they had not known about.  The stress had greatly increased when Castiel had to wait his turn to take the stand.

“Are you sure you don’t want to wait?” Jess asked.

“It isn’t a jury trial.  It’s just a judge that will make his decision.  With all those people there is no way that John is going to walk.  I don’t need to know what the punishment is.  I just need to know that there will be a punishment,” Castiel leaned against the headrest of the jeep as Jess turned the key.

“Alright,” Jess nodded and pulled out of the parking lot.

“Let’s go to the new place.  I think we could all use a drink,” Gabriel suggested.

“Sounds good,” Sam agreed, “I’ll let Dean know where we’re heading.  He’ll be getting off work and wanting to meet us.”

“Please I don’t think I can do it.  Thank you,” Castiel closed his eyes.

“Hey Dean.  Hold on what,” Sam’s brow creased, “holy shit.  Alright.  Meet us at Gabriel’s.  We’re heading there now.  Okay I won’t.  Promise.”

“What’s going on?” Castiel asked without opening his eyes.

“Cannot answer that,” Sam cleared his throat and swallowed down his excitement.

“Hmm.”

When they pulled up Dean was already there.  Castiel narrowed his eyes as he rushed over to him.  Castiel made a strangled noise when Dean lifted him and tight hug.

“Air,” Castiel gasped.

“Oh,” Dean grinned, “I’ve got news.”

Sam pulled out his phone and began to record them.

“We are officially foster parents,” Dean kissed Castiel.

Castiel stood stunned for a moment then kissed him back.  They laughed and hugged and cheered in the parking lot for a few minutes before they moved the celebration inside.

“We get them Saturday.  I told Missouri it made sense since they would be going on spring break.  That way they start back at the new school after having two weeks off.  It will give us time to adapt and not have to rush them into a completely new situation.”

“Mom and Mark are on their way here,” Sam hung up his phone.

“Kate sends a congratulations but cannot get out of work.  Adam says he’ll be down after classes,” Gabriel smiled.

“I’m gonna be a dad for real,” Dean beamed.

“Yeah you are.  First round is on the house little brother,” Gabriel grinned as he waved over a waitress.

“We’re parents,” Castiel leaned into Dean.

“Yeah we are,” Dean kissed his cheek, “and you get to go school supply shopping.  I know how much you love that.”

“Oh,” Castiel’s eyes widened, “I do.  Yes!”

“You’re such an office supply junky.”

“I bet they’ll need new everything.  I’ll get them new everything either way.  We should probably get desks for their rooms and a few more bookshelves.”

“Why did I say anything?” Dean laughed.

The rest of their family joined them with their celebration.  Food, family and friends left them exhausted.  When they got home Dean thought that he would be able to crawl into bed early for once but Castiel had other ideas.  Castiel rode him slowly into the night and Dean was okay with being a little sore in the morning that followed their night of passion.

<<<<>>>> 

Dakota giggled as Dean recited the vows he had written.  Castiel shook his head and held Dean’s hand in front the justice of the peace.  Shane wiped his eyes as Castiel leaned in and kissed Dean when they were done.

Gabriel, Sam and Jess took their place next in line.  There were ugly shouts from those that protested but they were ignored as they exchanged rings and were wed.  To everyone’s surprise Mark, Mary and Kate joined hands and stepped up after them.  Mary blushed as she kissed Kate.

“Holy hell.  Is anyone in our family normal?” Adam shook his head and laughed.

“No!” Everyone replied together as they made their out of the room.

“Let’s get to the restaurant before Sam passes out,” Gabriel jogged down the stairs.

“Hey,” Sam playfully pouted as he followed his husband.

“He hasn’t eaten since second breakfast he may not make it,” Jess teased.

“I’ve got a granola bar,” Dakota grinned, “if you don’t think you’ll make it.”

“Et tu Dakota?”

“She’s a girl after my own heart,” Gabriel chuckled.

“Uh,” Dakota blushed, “I prefer male pronouns if you don’t mind.”

Gabriel paused by his car and turned to Dakota.  He smiled softly at Dakota and ruffled his curls.

“Sure thing kiddo.  Thanks for lettin’ me know.”

Dakota’s eyes went wide and he nodded.  He had expected a bigger deal to be made.  He turned around and looked over to Dean.  Dean winked and mouthed ‘told ya so’.  Dakota smiled and got in the car.

 

“And how and the hell didn’t you tell us you were adding Kate to the family?” Dean shot his mom an accusatory look.

“Hmm could be just like you and Cas decided to lie to all of us about being engaged then falling in love after the fact,” Mary gave him the same look.

Dean was speechless.

“Yeah.  That’s what I thought.  I knew it was something different between you two and I had a very educational conversation with Missouri a couple of months ago.  It was very enlightening,” Mary sipped her wine.

“I see.”

“Hold on what?” Sam shot a confused look between them.

“Finally,” Castiel sighed with relief, “thank god.  I lied.  Oh god did I lie.  I am so sorry.  Mary I am so sorry for lying to you.  I couldn’t help it.  I told him I didn’t want to.”

“I know dear.  Dean can be very persuasive when he wants something.  It was all for a good reason.  We wouldn’t have Dakota and Shane if it hadn’t been for your little farce.  Just be lucky that Missouri likes you two.  Otherwise you would be in a lot of trouble.”

“At least Cas can stop having nightmares of you punishing him for lying now,” Dean chuckled.

“So you two weren’t engaged?” Gabriel stared open mouthed.

“Right.  Remember that cookout and mom outted the engagement?  Well we weren’t really engaged.  We only got really engaged after the engagement party,” Dean rubbed his neck.

“Hold up,” Jess put down her fork and knife, “so at the engagement party you weren’t really engaged?”

“Nope.”

“Well that kiss sure as hell looked real,” Mark stated.

“Oh it was,” Castiel nodded, “I was done with his crap.  I wanted him to know what I felt.  It worked,” he smiled fondly at Dean.

“Hell yeah it did,” Dean grinned.

“Jeez Louise.  You two are crazy,” Adam shook his head.

“Believe me it isn’t any better now,” Dakota shook his head, “there are so many bad dad jokes, cuddliness and just embarrassingly adorable behavior at home.”

“That I believe.”

 

John stood across the restaurant and looked at the tables pushed together.  What had once been his family was crowded around it.  They laughed, loved, and lived on without him.  He tucked his lips and held back the rage and sorrow that filled him.  Green eyes met his across the distance.  They held his.  The stare was cold and calculated.  A soft shake of the head and a scowl was delivered before the green eyes turned back and were once again filled with mirth and love.  John had left the jail house only to find out his family had moved on without him.  He had found out easily where they were and had headed over.  Never would it be his family again.  John turned and pushed his way pass several people to the exit.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well here we are guys. This has been a great ride. I have properly fattened everyone up with desserts. We shall gather for brunch tomorrow and have a grand time.
> 
> Thank you so much for all the love. I enjoyed every single comment and simply adore the kudos! I appreciate you all sharing your time with me and reading this story. You guys are my personal rock stars. Thank you all!
> 
> *throws cookies, brownies, and lemon squares*


End file.
